top of page

The Ornery P.S.A.
a philosophical-ish
Blog

 

It should not take a head injury
*after personally sustaining a head injury & coma*
to figure this out...

 
 
 
 
 
 


After a Drill Sergeant threw Me into the metal part of the bunk when I was in Basic Training for the United States of America's Army branch at Fort Sill Oklahoma #FortSill #FortSillOK #FortSillOklahoma #OK #Oklahoma in the year of 2000 on Psalm Sunday, I have dealt with the situations as best as I have been capable to do so while taking care of the situations and asking for assistance as per the required explanations of the information to such facts first.  While making the attempts to get assistance for the aspects thereof as to the reality, the aspects of where and when as to the multiple attempts to ask for assistance for me.  As my journal blog for when I was ready to bring such as to my other works forward since as to the lengths of time as to where my modeling was as to the modeling page information, just as the other pages have the information as to such specifics, and just as this journal blog of mine is as to such facts.


If I had real friends (if as to having met in person face to face in person in real life as to the aspects of this particular reference such as from the state of Texas as to the state of Washington as to the years of 2000 through 2013 if I met within the state of Texas for such references), real (the areas of the tristate region as before the year of 2000) family, and real relationships in real life that recognized me as to the aspects of if as to the face to face in person who started in truth as I had started such in truth as to the after effects from my Psalm Sunday 2000 head injury, as well as the subarachnoid hemorrhage in the frontal lobe of my brain that took 8.5 years to dissipate; then I guesstimate there would be the easier factors as to being capable for me to speak with others in truth in person face to face in person and/or through online measures as to such factors I suppose.  Though would such as to the knowledge of the ways as to how they began such discussions with me as to would there be such a situation, for them to consider as to such if factors as to such discussions with me in truth?


As to some suggestions and commentary within "Finding A Silver Lining" one of several of my bo0ks I personally authored/wrote/compiled as I can only speak and write in truth as per such clarifications as to the reality as to the specifics of such discussions/writings/videos as per my Official You Tube where I have satirical commentary where I comment about the factors as to having dealt with others' opinions about their pop culture references of #NJ #NJstate #NewJersey #NewJerseystate New Jersey, though as to for the most part I have actually preferred to be asked with politeness if as to having read my books and/or seen my website as just the same in reference to the timeframes when I was modeling as to having respect as to what I consider as respect, referencing if as to such polite manners as to discussions if as to such having been noticed because of the factors in my opinion as to having real discussions as communication would be if my website was seen before the year of 2023 as I first began my website in 2015; as in my journal blog posts as to the reality of the years of 2010 through 2013, as to the aspects of introductions as to those timeframes when as to various factors as I did not take selfies as I was actually working with photographers as to my creations of my outfits as per the description on the link to my modeling page(s) as to the references regarding my journal blog updates in the years of 2019 through 2022 as the timeframe onward as to the year of 2023 as to the factors as to how such journal blog entries will be as to such factors as to the aspects of the various topic points.


Go read through the multiple journal blogs on my website after finishing scrolling to get to the journal blog area, now!

Share the links of my journal blog, too!




 I was born and raised in New Jersey and grew up going throughout the tristate northeast areas mainly, and as to how the reality of when the importance of the situations as to the aspects of reviewing as to such facts regarding the logistics for several factors as to the considerations; the years of 2019 through 2022 as to the review process as to the aspects of the timeframe, prior to the timeframe of the 20 year memorial of 11 September 2001 also known as 9/11 as well as before the 30 year memorial of February 1993, as to the northeast areas mostly known as to New York City #NYC #NewYork #NY #NYstate #NYU though also as to the #Pentagon Pentagon, as well as Pennsylvania #Pennstate #Pennsylvaniastate as to the reality of how many New Jersey-ians commute in either direction, depending upon what location for the commute. 


The factors though I have said at times, I re-re-re-re-re-re-grew up in the state of  #Texas #TX #Texasstate Texas as to such factors as to the timeframes, as well as all 26 of my SCUBA #SCUBA #SCUBADiving  Diving certifications I earned were through one school within the state of Texas as I also earned winning first place in a Texas Chili cookoff with more than 20 entries as well as my chili recipe as I am adamant about my recipes as to such aspects just as I am specific as to what it actually takes for me to cook in a BBQ as to the required preparations for when I have BBQed.   



I can sarcastically write, those who know of the Rules of the BBQ as to where I grew up as to the Rules of the BBQ as to such factors to the considerations of such preparations.  However that is to cooking food as to the differences of my journal blog entries, as to the factors as to proverbial aspects of food for thought as the difference of real food in real life as to the facts of the situations to such attention to the details as well as attention to the information.


Such facts as to the metaphors in some of such factors that only after reviewing such information as to the aspects of the fiction book series that were as to for My personal life as to such dreamland sorts of factors as to the differences of such hypotheticals, the references thereof as to such regards as to the logistical emotional with the real situations as per the names I was informed of at the timeframes referenced review as to My journal blog as to the situations overall.  


If as to my journal blog being found and read as to where what I consider as common sense, as to the aspects of my satirical saying   how it should not take a head injury to figure out. 
 

*(sometimes utilizing articles discussing facts)*
By:  (Reverend) Susan MeeLing
also known as

The One & Only


(YouTube)   Lady Dori Belle


 

Business Card.jpg

REMEMBER:

After the head injury caused a coma while I learned how to deal with the headaches, migraines, cognitive disorders, memory problems, and other medical conditions I went from College Algebra with Trigonometry & Calculus down to 2nd grade math.  Here is how logic works for someone like me::

~  It took awhile for the doctor's recommendation to use sticky notes, to help remember.

~  It took several months to realize sticky notes moved, let alone to remember to speak with the doctor.

~  After I finally remembered to ask the doctor about the note problem, notebooks were recommended.

~  When I could remember to pick up a notebook, it took a long time to learn similar to sticky notes, notebooks are not always where they were placed.

~  After I was able to organize the notebooks over several months I still had not learned notebooks are not always readily available, at the necessary time.

~  When I remembered to speak with the doctor about the notebook problem the doctor had few other suggestions, to assist memories better.

~  After several events and adding up sticky note and notebook location problems, I realized my skin goes everywhere I do.

~  Wanting my tattoos to only be for me and not for public consumption I started the ink on my legs, able to hide easier.

~  It would not be until many tattoos and several years later I would realize my memory problems were usually not as bad when wearing shorts, capri pants, or a skirt.

~  Between 3-5 years after my first tattoo I had the first tattoo completed on my arms, and my memory has slowly progressed towards an easier memory jolt.

 

 

When I say "it should not take a head injury to figure this out" it is partially in humor from personal experiences, towards understanding.

 

If I can laugh at my mistakes after recognizing and dealing with them, so can you.

 

You have the knowledge, understanding, and wisdom I lack in order to put everything together to fix the problems seen with abilities I do not have. 

Utilize the information within the blog to find genuine repairs and instead of complaining of the "hurtful" commentary, prevent the issues from reoccurring.

Then again, it should not take a head injury to figure that one out.

Do make sure to link my journal blog entry articles to yours if you refer to my works for any of your research in the slightest, for proper credit. 

 

Thank you, in advance.

REMEMBER:

After the head injury caused a coma while I learned how to deal with the headaches, migraines, cognitive disorders, memory problems, and other medical conditions I went from College Algebra with Trigonometry & Calculus down to 2nd grade math.  Here is how logic works for someone like me::

~  It took awhile for the doctor's recommendation to use sticky notes, to help remember.

~  It took several months to realize sticky notes moved, let alone to remember to speak with the doctor.

~  After I finally remembered to ask the doctor about the note problem, notebooks were recommended.

~  When I could remember to pick up a notebook, it took a long time to learn similar to sticky notes, notebooks are not always where they were placed.

~  After I was able to organize the notebooks over several months I still had not learned notebooks are not always readily available, at the necessary time.

~  When I remembered to speak with the doctor about the notebook problem the doctor had few other suggestions, to assist memories better.

~  After several events and adding up sticky note and notebook location problems, I realized my skin goes everywhere I do.

~  Wanting my tattoos to only be for me and not for public consumption I started the ink on my legs, able to hide easier.

~  It would not be until many tattoos and several years later I would realize my memory problems were usually not as bad when wearing shorts, capri pants, or a skirt.

~  Between 3-5 years after my first tattoo I had the first tattoo completed on my arms, and my memory has slowly progressed towards an easier memory jolt.

 

 

When I say "it should not take a head injury to figure this out" it is partially in humor from personal experiences, towards understanding.

 

If I can laugh at my mistakes after recognizing and dealing with them, so can you.

 

You have the knowledge, understanding, and wisdom I lack in order to put everything together to fix the problems seen with abilities I do not have. 

Utilize the information within the blog to find genuine repairs and instead of complaining of the "hurtful" commentary, prevent the issues from reoccurring.

Then again, it should not take a head injury to figure that one out.

Do make sure to link my journal blog entry articles to yours if you refer to my works for any of your research in the slightest, for proper credit. 

 

Thank you, in advance.

Remember, since I was either six or seven years old I have been giving warnings as to the best of my ability as to the visions I had which began when I was in second grade of Elementary school.  The first warning I gave officially as to my nightmare vision compared to my dream vision was in the year of 1988 or 1989, compared to the online writings and my books as well as my journal blog entries year timeline for the information.


If anyone is upset please direct your upset towards those who had made the choices to constantly needlessly block my warnings and/or try to explain otherwise as to their trying to curb their responsibilities, in comparison to the responsible and respectful choices as best as I could possibly do so as a child starting as to such information at the age of when I was six in 1988 or seven years old in 1989.


I made every attempt to inform as best as I possibly could, though hopefully the clarifications throughout my various books and writings as well as journal blog entries compared to the amount of people in multiple areas which I had spoken with about in person from the years of 1988 or 1989 through to 2012 more continuously before 2013. 


In the year of 2019 is when I began reviewing such details and onward through the years since 2019 more officially, however I made the attempts to give the warnings and what others' choices have been as to whatever proof thereof to who you should be speaking with as to what they told you in comparison as to the upset and anger with in comparison.


How many assistances I have made attempt towards betterment as to the clarifications from the year of 1988 or 1989 onward did it truly have to take for each to genuinely pay attention, as I have been making the best attempts to assist for the best possibilities how?

The Oak Leaf Part 1

If in the timeframe of the year of 2004 how the needless amounts of technological reapplications for email addresses and social media accounts per the factors of authentications since the year of 2004, have been. It is something that has been frustrating since I woke up from my coma as to the difficulties I have had with technology since the year of 2000, when taking in considerations the 1980s and the 1990s per such timeframes of the amounts of computers in my background from those years. In the 1980s and the 1990s my elementary school had a computer lab as did my middle school, however my high school did not have a computer lab. I had two computers in the house I grew up in the latter 1980s and that was unheard of for many back then, though in the latter 2000s into the 2010s that started to become more of a normalcy. Cellular phones were a normalcy for more around the timeframe of the 2010s into the 2015s, though I had a cellular phone around the year of 2000 or 2001 with a desktop computer and the laptop computer additionally was around the year of 2004 per the combinations of differences per the timeframes differences to this year of 2023 depending upons. I only had for my children the Nintendo Wii, the Xbox, and/or Playstation in the years of 2008 through 2013 for the record.



Though would such be the proverbial saying of “life imitates art and art imitates life” per such technology imitates life as life imitates technology” if there was a saying of such previous to me, I have not ever had as many issues signing into anything until after the year of 2003, per such unwanted moved from the state of Illinois to the state of Texas regarding what I explained per such regarding the year of 2002 during the Christmas season regarding such individuals. If they had sought to give me the belief as to how unwanted I was from the start, they successfully did so through moving from the state of Illinois to the state of Texas as I would have been happier if I had just been living in the state of Texas and only visited when it was comfortable for me personally instead of ever having to deal with such overdramatic individuals where I was making a life for myself.



Why that is important in reference to the technological factors is an easy factor to answer, when having made attempts to go directly to agencies and other agencies fight amongst themselves instead then the situations of the caught in between in the attempts to go directly to. In regards of “The Adventures of Susan MeeLing, SCUBA Diver Extraordinaire” I explained how many times I had made attempts to find a safe route to get my belongings directly to the correct agencies. While I admitted to drinking the vials of the bioluminescence type of liquid, there are coastlines along the state of Florida that have such a colored liquid in the waters and I doubt anyone there has dealt with as many situations as I have throughout such short periods of time. However per such situations whether regarding the fact that such occurred in the year of 2009, whom has made amends for what has occurred?



I did not blame the entire Army for what occurred because of one Drill Sergeant who took responsibility for what occurred and the Armed Forces of the United States of America made amends per the timeframe of my VA, however that was not a blank check for anything or everything else nor anyone else whatsoever. If there are extraterrestrial enthusiasts I would not know one way or the other, nor would I know if there are those whom fear such as much as I have since the timeframe of my childhood through my teenager years into my adult years, as whom I refer to as my Black Suit Guys did not appear afraid when speaking with me during those times. They seemed concerned and they wanted to know what happened the way law enforcement has for certain situations, though did not overreact in such situations for the most part. Admittedly if my Black Suit Guys I knew were around when the year of 2009 occurred, they did not do what I remember of them in the latter 1980s and the 1990s. There were not any times I was pulled to the side of a crowded room with the normal code words, nor were there any times we went walking where they carried their pen and pad of paper to take notes randomly, and there definitely was not the discussions about the extraterrestrials nor my SCUBA Diving or swimming that had happened the ways that such was back in the day.



I know how they would have been in that year of 2009 if they remembered me, just as I know how they would have been in the year of 2004 if they remembered me and were informed about what occurred and that definitely does not account for what would have happened in the year of 2011. Thus my opinion was that 11 September 2001 had gotten more of them just in the same ways as 1993 had taken a lot of their vehicles in one of the many garages, in New York City. Personally I lost a lot of people in February of 1993 just as I lost a lot of people in 11 September 2001 and throughout the years from 1998 through to that time of 2022 in February when I finally was capable to make it back to the northeast of the United States of America, and yes I have been quite lonely for such lengths of years if anyone was wondering. Those years from 2001 through 2022 were some of the most heart wrenching times for me personally even though I attempted to make the best of the times as I could, those families and those friends and that length of time were so important and yet so pertinent for much.



One year after 2007 I told my father in the backyard of San Antonio Texas that I had a vision that there would be a day when I would be surrounded by people who were paid to be around me at all times, and that I was their source. I told him in the vision I went through many areas before that time and there would be a group who were mad at me for going so many places, though I thought it was because of the traveling from San Antonio Texas to Fort Worth Texas and back yet I told him there were plants that I did not recognize though seemed familiar to the northeast coast. Then I could not say the state of Alabama nor could I say the state of Montana nor Wyoming or Colorado, though now as I type in the year of 2023 I can remember the vision that I had. In such it was like seeing a movie on the fast forward button for those who remember what it was to watch a VHS tape and fast forward, though some clips on social media can be a smaller way of such a vision through seeing myself traveling through and driving and walking around. Not the same way per my official You Tube Channel, though more-so in the when people are creating pieces of furniture or artwork as to the kind of factors of what the vision looked like during those times to discuss as I had the vision a few times before I could put it into words to explain.



I was not asked what I thought of my vision, I was only asked more details about what I saw.



However if I were asked then, I cannot say or type what I felt back then though I can remember sensing a bit of calming when I could finally explain my vision. Having sight is a difficult task admittedly because depending upon who is discussed with depends upon the response, and that in itself can be a frightening experience for me because of the factors of how many years and how many situations. Now seeing a symbol that reminds me of the year of 2004, it takes my memories back to the time of when in my backyard the Oak Leaf situations occurred.



In a concern of mine regarding after 11 September 2001, I could tell there were problems regarding the family life in Illinois though what such was at the time was unbeknownst to me at that time. I could guess all I could, though it was best written by someone I met a few times in Illinois about he and my sister and the house in Illinois. I had told others that my biological mother was a Deacon, and my biological father was a Trustee at Old Tennent Presbyterian Church, and their employment regarding only a few small factors. The words to put into such accounts at such times was difficult for me, mainly because of the aftereffects from Psalm Sunday in the year of 2000 or 16 April 2000 when I was thrown into the metal part of the bunk bed that were not bunk beds though at one time were. The metal frame that my head was struck against when I was thrown left a dent in my skull permanently, though I am alive and that was/is considered a miracle because of what the damages were from the subrachnoid hemorrhage in the frontal lobe of my brain. The length of time that it took for the blood clot to dissipate out from the view of the MRI/CAT scans so that I personally was in the clear. It was known in my Basic Training that I was tougher than my age at the time, as the Drill Sergeants had asked me many questions. My MOS classification was a big deal to everyone in my Basic Training though the respect I earned from my fellow Basic Trainees per their words, was because even though I “was squared away” I took the time to assist the others when I could have been known for having my stuff together correctly first. The respect I earned from my Drill Sergeants of my squad and my platoon were along similar lines, it was a Drill Sergeant from another Company that had caused my head injury or TBI (Traumatic Brain Injury).



When I was informed of the investigations that occurred in the year of 2005 when I was informed, I was told about the actual remorse the Drill Sergeant had that made sense to me. He was upset that I was not in his unit nor under his control and my MOS classification was something that many of the Drill Sergeants were intrigued by, since my age at the time was seventeen years old. In my thoughts even in the year of 2005, I was still young. Far too young for me to be involved with my Black Suit Guys, though the reality of the 2004 situation was a passing discussion with that particular doctor per the difference of the doctors at Wilford Hall in the year of 2004 and 2005. It made sense only because of the question I had in reference of the timeframe of what I would do if a Four-Star General had demanded to have access to whatever my supply was, and I informed the Drill Sergeants accurately that my supply chain would always be the highest amounts of security to the best of my capability. If that meant I had to stand up and defend such until I could be given the requirements that would be for such, I would then allow such. However there was not anyone that I was in such discussions in charge of, nor have I given such over to this point in time. Since I did not attend AIT after my Basic Training, those codes were not for me to discuss because there were no codes for me to discuss. However because of what my Drill Sergeants had said both Drill Sergeant Parsley and Drill Sergeant Gonzoles, they had said I responded correctly regarding how I would have to be if I were approached by such a ranking as an enlisted at that time. Thus since squared away soldiers per graduations are considered a rarity back then in the year of 2000, I could understand to a degree regarding the situations in reference to what my doctor had told me that he had found out in reference of the time of the year of 2005.



Thus in reference to those who know what Basic Training is, my biological mother contacted the Drill Sergeants almost every couple of days as I was informed during my Basic Training. Despite all of the work I did to the best of my capability and despite being known as “squared away”, those who know Basic Training know how that is. Those who do not, children who are above the age of 20 years old living their lives while being at work is the only reference I can give per such references.



Thusly when taking in considerations that my biological parents had as their employment at Old Tennent Presbyterian Church was to only make things easier for me personally, because of me being the original of original baby Jesus Christ factors. I was the one who was in the manger in the garage live nativity in the year of 1982 and 1983 before the different appearances in the year of 1984 and 1985, though 1986 was the year it was split into two at Old Tennent Presbyterian Church. The Deacons had the roles they had within the church, though my biological mother had less work because of the work it was to raise me as a child and then also in reference of my biological four-year younger birth sister. My biological father as a Trustee was too in a more lenient position because of his work taking care of the jewelry and watches for various members of the church, their families, and their friends as well as where he was contracted to do additional work for such pieces. The additional activities of the church such as choir, handbells, and the picnics were depending upon whatever levels of involvements they chose though when in reference to my biological sister came the issues of turmoil within the church.



They did not have the leisure to do anything of their own free will per such factors that the church did not approve of them having a second child, from the beginning. I was supposed to remain as an only child according to my Great Grandparents, though I was not very social as a child with other children I was more social with those older and elder than I. When I was asked about the terminology of abortion factors and per my decision of life, the automatic assumption that I would approve of the life that was not allowed to be regarding my biological little sister as later told to me. The reality of such was that they had planned to get pregnant and then they planned to ask the church to then plan to ask me, and thus purposefully per such thinking they would have higher standing within the church instead of the exacts that they were agreed to per such only. When the factors as to the purposeful pregnancy to test me, then my Bok Pu had stepped in and informed the individual known as my biological parents that she did not approve of the second child either.



That caused a lot of controversy within the church once that was brought to light, as my Bok Pu and my Bok Gung were known to the church as to having donated many amounts of finances because of my Bok Pu’s love for the United States of America. The explanation that my Bok Gung gave was the second child or my biological little sister was the devil born on earth, and everything bad that would ever be due to that factor of whatever she would be. In the timeframe of the 1980s my biological mother tried to tell others that she could not connect with me at all because I cared more about life than what she had thought would be, and thus she thought that having a second child she could connect with instead of the original baby Jesus Christ.



The common sense for that was that she connected more with the satanic factors than the Christ factors, however the oddity is that Christ is considered the Devil in the older biblical scriptures whereas Satan is considered a cherubim in the older scriptures. Those whom have read through older translations of the Bible would know the references of the differences and thus Adam and Eve were tempted by the devil, though not tempted by Satan. The name of the Devil does not come into the biblical texts of the older bibles until the New Testament, though the Devil is not considered as Lucifer and thus the studies of the older bibles printed decades before the 1910s translate that Christ or Jesus Christ is actually Lucifer in the Old Testament or the condensed version of the New Testament. The scholars of the biblical studies of the older books of the older printings would know the references of what I type, in regards of what the references are.



The older biblical factors do not hint and do not have hints in the references of what character name is what character within the bible, though others who had written their own versions and had left out names were to blame for the problems regarding the understanding. Hence when I had said “if it were not for man, there would not be any problems understanding the Bible at all”.



Realistically if the human species did not change anything from the original texts and scripts of the Bible originally, there would be nothing to interpret as was intended from the start. There were not metaphors, there were not hints, there were not guessing factors whatsoever as per what was important for such learning from the beginning. However due to a version of Adam and Eve though per such references where Adam had not wanted Eve to look as much of a whore of abominations as she was, the factors of the Book of Revelations per such longer translations of the Bible. Thus individuals whom have been confused by the bible were not ever intended to be confused, that would be the factors as to Lucifer thinking he was better than God and could rewrite factors per the proverbial apple biting from what was not an apple though the tree of life and knowledge.



Thus such a discussion between the factor that had given my the Oak Leaf and I had, that I had written about after having told others about.



Having always been highly spiritual in my life well before I ever learned that I was the original baby Jesus Christ, the factors regarding the biblical factors can be seen in reference to my biological four-year younger sister per the reality of what her sexual partners in reality are per the factors of any male that would be a party of such factors. The common sense per the metaphors regarding such individuals whom claim to love being involved with the supposedly consenting adult lifestyle, thus they should love their real numbers also instead of ever trying to change the facts just so the female who laid down willingly could feel better about her whoredom factors and her abominations. The same too for males that dream of or wish or lust after a female whom is not interested in such aspects should be per the truth only per such factors, instead of the smearing of such name because of having either not having been noticed from the start or not having been lusted after in return.



Religious studies are something I am uncertain about the magnitude of situations per The Blue Book Project, if that was something they had taken into consideration. In reference to situations such as Gimby and/or the Tic Tac and/or other situations, I am uncertain what the levels of spirituality and/or religion is per the individuals themselves per the experiences either. I am uncertain if that is another questions to consider per the references of encounters, though that depends upon if others have thought of such factors as to the depth levels regarding the situational experiences.



Some females actually require the reality of what is more than between the sheets in order to get into the sheets for such, though in the supposedly consenting adult lifestyle the only sheets are the fitted sheets on the bed and thus befitting of such individuals is per the factors of their exact numbers.



While I can regret my own stupidity of such factors of not knowing or not seeing or not being interested per the exact ways of such factors, I am and have been quite content not fitting a mold and also not fitting into what others consider being normal.



That was before the year of 2004, that was before the year of 2009, that was before the year of 2011 obviously.



Thus while I have appreciated the modeling pictures that have been taken of me, my personal goal for modeling that I did not express to others was not for others to be allowed to know either.



If they were not the photographer and if they were not going to pay me for my modeling work that I wanted to do, then they were not of an interest of mine for any such factors of my modeling work.



In turn such regarding individuals who have thought they knew what is for a celebrity, did not know my celebrity status before I ever began modeling. A real man does not make things difficult for any female if he is a real man in my opinion, as a real man actually in the mature ways and not in a sexual mature way as that is not a man to expect such from every or any female; that is the mark of the Satanic factors to only think of such in an overtly sexualized way per each and every female per the biblical factors. A male is to genuinely assist a female as per what chivalry is, when a female should not have to explain each and every small little thing to someone they were not attracted to from the start to begin with especially. It is not chivalry to cause problems for a female and then think that he is anything other than the opposite of chivalry, per common sense. The versions of the Old Testament that have the truth of how the devil spoke with Adam, is also not in the modern times of the biblical references I noticed. That is a whole other factor of consideration for the context, because it was not just because Eve ate from the Tree of Knowledge as Adam himself was guilty before God’s sight and not only because of the nakedness that they tried to hide.



Thus also in such references, in order to have a contract with me required actually having something worthwhile for me to personally consider that I would actually want and seek for myself personally.



Thus the references biblically per the tree of knowledge and the Garden of Eden references for those whom have read older scriptures of the Bible would know the first five books and some of the Old Testament are just some of the books for the Bible per the texts. The type of child that I was, I enjoyed reading books and being allowed to read scriptures from the original texts per such times before the time of the 1993 attack on New York City, was one of my favorite memories from my childhood because of how much retention I had per those times. The biblical reality is in the area of New York City there is actually an area called Babylon and the area of Babylon has many areas nearby that in the 1980s per such references, many tried to pretend they did not know about their own sexual history well into the 1990s as I wrote about in my journal blog The Ornery PSA. The facts are probably the same in such hypotheticals regarding similar situations to a degree about such factors, however the references regarding the names and the actual exact individuals possibly are different and/or possibly some connection link per such if factors.



In reference of the year of 2004 and the discussion that occurred in reference of the Oak Leaf for those who are aware of such, the factors of the differences in the texts were discussed as when 11 September 2001 occurred it was explained to me much of what had occurred that I did not see when in the times of September and October and November of the year of 2001.



First I should clarify in reference to the Oak Leaf, I did not ask for a name nor did I seek the name of the being that gave me the Oak Leaf. It was not because I did not care about the name of the being, nor did I not care about what the name for the species of the being, it was more of the frightening factors involved at the time. The same in reference to the timeframe of the year of 2011, for such clarifications and at the timeframe of the situations regarding The Oak Leaf I had been heavily studying various spiritual paths while remembering the timeframe from when I was a child. Working on my memory deficits and cognitive disorders from the after effects from my head injury/TBI from the day of Psalm Sunday or the 16th of April in the year of 2000 per the difference of the year of 2004, I had only been capable to work on the lowering of my headache pain levels through the medical factors. In that year of 2004, I had begun seeking homeopathy and ayurvedically medicines that could possibly assist to alleviate the pain levels to lower them. Though the cognitive disorders and memory deficits there is truthfully only one way to describe such with the situations, at the time. While my children one born in the year of 2001 and one born in the year of 2002, I was regrowing up with them while raising them at the same exact point in time.



From the point in time from being in Medical Hold Unit, I had noticed issues with technology. There was a point in time that when walking past a desktop tower that the spark that came from when I walked, had caused an internal combustion within the tower and throughout the entire first floor. I remember my headache pain level going instantly from a headache to a migraine, just before that occurred. I did not touch the desktop of any portion nor the desk that the computer was upon, though the individuals in Medical Hold Unit made jokes that it had to do with the area that my basic training was in. Fort Sill Oklahoma is an area that I am unaware of the intricacies of the base location, though I also do not remember any extra terrestrial activities when I was there. I do remember I was surprised how warm the weather was in the month of March and April of that year of 2000, since I had not ever been below the Mason Dixon Line prior to the with the exception of one trip to the state of Florida for a handbell choir competition.



Thus by the time of the year of 2004 the amount of issues that were noticed with technology and I were for a length of just around three and a half years, and the situations that occurred after The Oak Leaf only added to such factors. I have pushed myself to attempt to get better utilizing technology without causing any damages to anything at all, though I can only do so much. I can remember working on the IBM/DOS desktop computer that I had when I was a child in elementary school well, though I had to use a brass lamp to ground myself before touching the computer since others joked it had to do with my high spiritual energy. I had worked on the Apple Macintosh computers in the elementary school and the Apple and the Windows computers in middle school with very few issues, though I did not do any programming when I was a child. However through just meandering around the computers, I was known to find programs that others did not know existed and that became a big deal within anywhere I was at regarding the uses.



In reference to the IBM/DOS computer desktop at the house I grew up in, the internet without a landline connection I found in the game of pool and the game of hearts. I showed my biological mother what I found since it seemed concerning, and dealt with the factors of her being upset that there was a connection I found. Since there was not wireless connection in the 1980s, that became a big deal at the time. The same occurred per a dropdown window in the elementary school computer lab, though it became more of an amazement than anything of trouble per such differences. In middle school a similar situation occurred, though then was when my spirituality became a bigger deal because of the similar factors regarding Medical Hold Unit. It was known that I did not watch any movies or television past the time of 8:30pm and nothing that was watched was on anything except the rabbit ears television, thus everything that I watched was the 1980s and the 1990s version of G rated television and such movies also per the ratings. Thus I did not have much time to watch movies or television with my childhood upbringing, and what little time that there was to watch movies or television was limited to the timeframe of the ratings for the movies of G rated until after my 14th birthday. By that time it was so engrained in me that very few types of watching became interesting to me, and even lesser amount of time to do so as usually only the weekends was there time for me to watch if I was interested in seeing anything.



Granted I did make attempts and successfully so to watch the Sailor Moon television series when it first started to come out in the TV Guide information, though I could explain myself if I would have been caught watching movies since it was after the time of midnight of the day prior and it was before the time shortly to a degree to the time I needed to go to school. Thus the 2:30am and 3am and 3:30am shows if I had been caught by my biological parents, I had the explanations ready. However, that was if I would have been caught. That specific word of “if” is the keyword, regarding the timeframe from around third grade through high school. That was my rebellion as a child and a teenager for what could be considered the worst thing I did per the age timeframe for me, thus many individuals considered me a square for what I watched during those years and yet there were still the commercials during that timeframe that if they knew as I tried to explain to them then they would know it was far more risqué for me to sneak to watch Sailor Moon.



Yes risqué, not risky.


Yet with a Deacon and a Trustee as the factors of my biological parents, technically if per their ages the both factors if they had known and if I had been caught back then.



Though after I was in fifth or sixth grade is when Sailor Moon was also on in the afternoon, and slowly by the time of when I was in middle school was when the show was on only in the afternoon. Some who began to watch Sailor Moon were brought in at the season or two behind where the actual length of the seasons and the movies, were not in the mainstream at the timeframe of what I had seen already. If I remember correctly by the time the shows began in the after school timeframe, the movies were already and the entire Sailor Scout team including Sailor Venus was at the starting point for the after schoolers per the difference of the entirety of the show’s storyline. When I saw the movie” Kill Bill” marathon on television, I had wondered if the film producer had watched similarly per the way Sailor Moon had been per the timeframes.


Thus in reference of the technology, shortly after the 2004 Oak Leaf situation was when the marathon was. By that point in time the desktop computer was an issue though the situations of 13 laptops from the year of 2006 through 2013 per the accidental warranty program situations were extremely different than any situations thereafter, per the ways of the technological issues that were. Thus because of what was told to me as the “high frequency the natural spiritual” that I am, by that time of 2013 per “Finding A Silver Lining Written By: Susan MeeLing” per such factors of my considerations at those times both before and after The Oak Leaf situation. The Oak Leaf occurred in the second year of owning the house in San Antonio Texas, since that was the second year that two ducks and a Canadian Goose had perched themselves within the Oak Tree in the front yard.



The exact month of The Oak Leaf, I cannot remember. I only remember it was in the year of 2004, somewhere in the timeframe of after spring though could have been through to an early summer month. Only in the year of 2020 or 2021 had I learned the little I had about the USA Navy in the Pacific area of the oceanic waters having had the Gimby and/or the Tic Tac situation, and I am unaware of the any ifs or exacts for such a timeframe of their exacts per The Oak Leaf. The timeframe of I had arranged my own sweat lodge in a different manner, though I did the best that I could within my health situation during the timeframe. I had gotten a dark colored tent to the best of capability, a sleeping bag meant for below freezing temperatures, extra blankets, and I put the tent in the most direct pathway of the sunlight to maximize the heat index for my attempt.



The first twenty-four hours of the seventy-two-hour sweat lodge was peaceful and calming however sometime between the thirty-six hours to forty eighth or fifty eighth hour of my sweat lodge vision quest, was when The Oak Leaf occurred. The main situation I was capable to tell most others of whomever I spoke with before putting it into writing in “Finding A Silver Lining Written By: Susan MeeLing” was as follows:



I was sitting inside of my tent meditating after having completed a meditation walk of my backyard, and my mediation walk was with my eyes closed while sensing the grounds with my feet as I meandered throughout the backyard. When I returned to my tent, I closed the doorway to mediate. Sitting within my tent, I noticed a heat that was much more condensed though permeating from the outside of my tent at the door instead of throughout my tent per the way it should have been for the seat lodge. It was still warm inside of my tent and the heat from the day was still fairly fresh, though there was a glowing that caught my attention. I opened my eyes slowly to see the glowing was in an oval shape outside of the doorway, and then when I was ready to I opened the door flap to my tent. I saw an oak leaf shape similar to Oak Leaves from the northeast of the United States of America, thus the Scientific Name of Quercus for the clearer defined factors of the leaf shape of the oval and the size of around 5 to six inches long. The illumination color of sparkling that emanated around the leaf startled me at first and however long it took me to, “I waved my hand above the leaf without it moving or changing position.



I did the same to the underneath area, the sides, the front, and the back because of my own personal disbelief. The Oak Leaf did not move, and that startled me additionally. Then I pulled and pushed The Oak Leaf in multiple directions, from my own personal disbelief at that time in the year of 2004. When I slid my fingers along the sides of The Oak Leaf searching then for a spider web or something as at the time my children’s biological father had made fun of me for my spirituality, as he had from the time of when finding out I was pregnant with my son as I truly thought he was doing something to make fun of me again. The movie reference when I was pregnant was an early example of such when I had to be rushed to the emergency room from his prank that went wrong, regarding the first rated R movie I had seen. There were multiple situations similar to that during the first few months of my pregnancy, though that was one of the few times I had actually been taken to the hospital because of how badly everything went.



Thus I thought there had to be something he was doing to present such, until I stepped outside of my tent to see The Oak Leaf still remaining there. The Sycamore tree and the Red Bud tree were normally illuminated from the street lamp, and that did not cause any of the factors as I sought for am explanation for such. My first thoughts of the prank went away when I hear some of the birds in the bushes fluttering their wings, since they made different sounds when I was alone per the difference of when my children’s biological father was nearby as they usually attacked him for being anywhere near me. There were no frogs making sounds in the yard and that was odd at that point in time, because I usually had a few frogs that would be nearby me whenever I was outside in the evening hours. There were no sounds from any of the streets nearby, since usually a vehicle would drive over the speed bumps ever hour. There was just the sounds from the fluttering of the wings of the birds in the bushes, and the sound of my breathing.



When I stepped outside after testing The Oak Leaf, I saw a small figure in the corner of the backyard near the concrete sign and then a small figure similarly near the back part of the shed near the fence line.



That is the most I usually discussed with anyone after that timeframe in an overall way, since usually the discussion was changed if someone came nearby or if there was a disturbance in the discussions over the years in an overall factor. To be honest in the midst of typing this I sought a YouTube video about the Gimby and/or the Tic Tac situation though thankfully, I found videos about the power of the United States of America’s Navy. A welcome and comforting sight and many comforting sounds to me personally, especially since this year of 2023 in the month of September when I begin this book is the first time I am allowing myself to delve deeper into the situations I refer to as The Oak Leaf and also Irving 2011. However to be honest after I went to the hospital after what occurred in a hotel at Zionville Indiana, I decided to have myself checked further because of such situations. If I was only diagnosed with suicidal ideations and depression, I knew that I was going to be correct of the situations.



In my defense I have not met anyone whom has had the exact levels of everything combined and to handle everything completely by myself without the support of family and friends throughout the years on a consistent basis when needing such though acknowledging no one can speak for me personally, I cannot believe there are individuals who could not understand the reasons why either because of such combinations as I have been told by others they did not understand or know how I could handle the situations in years prior referencing only one or two or three circumstances. Thus the distinguishing factors of the timeframes are of importance additionally, in my opinion. However so too, is the truth of importance.



I acknowledge the timeframe since February of the year of 2022 was too much for me to personally handle by myself, since I made the attempts to reconnect with individuals. However since I knew that I was going to make the journey to the northeast of the United States of America in the year of 2020 for the first time, the updates to my journal blog on my website www.susanmeeling.com was on purpose for myself and the if factors of the situations when having learned about the cellular phone merger. My own fear had gotten the better of me per the situations that I sensed were going to be rough for me personally to handle, though I knew I had to make my way to the east of the United States of America. I had written about the individuals I had once known per their pop culture references of the New Jersey area and my personal opinions of such, especially in my time of needing friends and emotional support.



In my opinion My suicidal factors per the quietness of the individuals I once looked so highly up to, I needed to review such factors myself for myself. That array of trips back to the east coast after the situations of 11 September 2001 was hard hitting, though the timeframe of February 2022 when seeing the Statue of Liberty and knowing the exact size viewpoints per the 19810s and the 1990s to the difference of what I saw; I knew before I could write about Irving 2011 or The Oak Leaf any further in the year of 2023, I knew I needed to be evaluated. If the worst was the suicidal factors and the already having been diagnosed with depression, I was and I am content per such factors per the metaphorical references when taking into consideration the proverbial factors. The reality is it would have been wonderful to actually have real family and real friends where they should have been per if per such real family and real friends per the descriptions of what real family is supposed to be and real friends are supposed to be, however in such timeframes of my trips in the year of 2020 through 2022 to the east coast; looking back now in the year of 2023, those hypotheticals per those types per those hypotheticals per those types. If the preference would have been for their pop culture, there was not going to be any real friends per such a timeframe. If the biological factors were only going to complain about the trips they made to the east coast without me purposefully before, then such would not have been worthwhile nor supportive for me personally.



I suppose that reminder was necessary hypothetically before the first trip I made to the east coast in December of 2020, prior to the January 2021 trip, and the rest of the trips in 2021 and 2022 to the northeast of the United States of America. While I could not assist the Washington DC and Virginia areas because I was not born and raised in those areas and I had only been to Washington DC to the DC Aquarium in the 1990s, maybe some of my Facebook Live and/or official YouTube Channel videos and/or Instagram pictures were capable to assist others’ memories to come forward to assist the CD and Virginia areas per the Pentagon and such the ways if possible to assisting the northeast of the United States of America regarding those whom lived in other areas of the United States of America per their knowledge since those who remained after surviving would only be desensitized to the if factors of any hypothetical accuracies of mine. Thus having been checked out and cleared to the degrees that are, now is the point in time of the Mutual Unidentified Flying Objects Network questionnaire for deeper depths of the timeframe of The Oak Leaf since the words to describe other factors have been difficult. There are a small select number of individuals whom had lengthier discussions with me about The Oak Leaf in that year of 2004, however those are a length of time ago regarding those specific individuals. The most predominant individuals I spoke with about in more depth was whose marker I went in an overall way to go see in the year of 2019, my ex-father-in-law. I explained in discussions before putting such into writing in “Finding A Silver Lining Written By: Susan MeeLing” for that particular reference.



I must add before writing again the description of occurrences, seeing the YouTube videos about what the United States of America’s Armed Forces Navy branch has for some of the classes of naval ships, I was a bit emotional in a massive amount of gratitude for such vessels and members of the branch. For the first time ever I actually saw some calming factors to situations such as The Oak Leaf, though especially in reference of the year of 2009 and my childhood when I grew up going to the Atlantic for camp and such activities. It was a welcome sight to me to know there is more than just knowing I did not know what I did not know, though having the knowledge that I did not know what I did not know and those few moments of gave me a sense of peace that truthfully overwhelmed me. However in reference of “The Adventures of Susan MeeLing SCUBA Diver Extraordinaire” books for those chapters in this book in more depth, I am even more thankful and grateful for the Armed Forces of the United States of America than I already was before.



If the Gimby and/or the Tic Tac situation was during the timeframe of my vision quest sweat lodge, I would not have known that since I did not learn of the possibility until the year of 2020 or 2021 regarding any video footage. I am thankful to have found other videos about the United States of America’s military maritime vessels that are in operation though the length of time that such would be allowed to know to the general public, since recollecting and reflecting upon the situations. The closest way to describe it would being a child with a nightmare and then running to the guardian adults to have the nightmare calmed because of the strength and nature of discussions, is the closest I could imagine to explain such a sensation. After what I dealt with in the year of 2009 especially and wish I knew of the boat vessels in such a manner, since I would have been calmer then and later if I had known. I thought that it was the beginning of a scrap yard in the year of 2009 to a degree, and thankfully there are more than just the one vessel regarding the Nimitz Class USS/USNS General Hoyt S. Vandenberg. I like to think of it as a showcase now in the year of 2023, to let the others throughout the oceanic waters that above the waters we have more than just that one vessel.



I am just one person, it is such a relief for such.



In reference to the Mutual UFO Network survey regarding the sighting, the abduction, and the encounter with an entity references I believe for several instances the aspects that I have already answered many of the questions in reference to my books I authored/wrote/compiled throughout the years including the reference of missing children in reference to after the year of 2009 regarding the Fort Worth Zoo though also in reference to several other factors after The Oak Leaf. A few questions from Mutual Unidentified Flying Objects Network such as if I received any task or mission, I was not given any such task or mission during The Oak Leaf. I believed the Oak Leaf was a peace offering or possibly like when someone hands a flower to a friend or someone they like in a only just because of a gift without any situations that would be making up for something, in my opinion The Oak Leaf was in a seeking friendship or seeking along such lines rather than a designated mission for me. Though if there is a large number of pop culture references similar to what I dealt with referencing the misunderstandings between New York City and New Jersey or Philadelphia and New Jersey or Pittsburg and New Jersey or Maryland and New Jersey or Massachusetts and New Jersey for a few reference regarding the year of 1998 and 1999 before the time in the state of Texas, I could look back to such situations now in some references possibly.



I will write in this typing the pop culture reference only recently I saw of the Baby Yoda that is cute, reminds me a little bit of what the being looking physically though around two and a half to three feet tall in reference to The Oak Leaf. However not that young looking as the pop culture reference of the Baby Yoda I saw in the year of 2020 or 2021 as it was much older looking in the physical appearance from the commercials I saw, the Baby Yoda if there were to be an older looking version for a reference in human being years could be closer to a 75 year old per the difference of what the commercials of that pop culture reference of seemingly like a toddler age per human years.



I would not say nor write that experiences that lead to The Oak Leaf would only be in reference of spiritual connections, though admittedly the references of my Clack Sut Guys would be they met me usually when I went to church when I was a child. While The Oak Leaf occurred when I was in the midst of a sweat lodge vision quest, there are other situations in my life that I had experiences when there was not the heavy study of religion or spirituality that I have had. For the reference of The Oak Leaf, that predominantly has to do with the timing of my vision guest sweat lodge. However, I did not seek extra terrestrial communication in the slightest.



I was seeking spiritual guidance only because of the situations at the time that I was dealing with in an overall way, and that was what happened to occur.



Recently while speaking with an individual on the phone there was a confirmation of certain traumas that I have survived in reference to the subrachnoid hemmorhage in the frontal lobe of my brain, and also the other after effects from my Psalm Sunday in the year of 2000 head injury when I spoke with in the year of 2023. I have listened to some videos in recent years since the year of 2020, though only since the year of 2020 have I ever sought other information about such if situations. While I have had the privy of reading The Blue Book Project or as I refer to it as The Big Blue Book around the year of 2006, those particulars I personally do not remember the majority of the documentation about different scenarios that were written about. I did get the privy to see pictures that were inserted into the pages of the books that were quite gruesome that were paperclipped in within the book, though such images were of surgeries that were performed from the as I presume medical staff on hand at those times.



Thus in my personal opinion I believe the Armed Forces of the United States of America’s branch the United States of America’s Space Force is pertinent, for the reference point of Israel’s defense system that fires rocket launchers at incoming missiles from the surrounding regions. That sort of system is a similar quality of the militarized version of my creation of The Underwater Travel System that I drew up in the year of 2014 and 2015 for the differences. I wrote about such in my journal blog The Ornery PSA and my book series “The Adventures of Susan MeeLing, SCUBA Diver Extraordinaire” where I utilize my legal first name and my legal middle name per such differences of my legal last name in such conjunctions because even though I kept my legal married last name or my children’s biological father’s last name for the purposes when it was in relation to them; the facts are that in the year of 2009 amongst the Scuba divers in person face to face in person, I clarified such per the facts of many situations that stemmed before the time of the year of 2000, before obviously also the years of 2001 and 2002 and 2009. My certifications are legally through such the legal factors, though I was known then as per my author name per my legal first and my legal middle names only.



Out of respect of the wishes from my biological mother and my biological father in the year of 2004 and 2005, I refrained from using my Maiden/Army Enlisted and Marine and Science Technology School with the Navy attachment last name per my SCUBA Diving for such clarifications. They were informed of the exact situations described in “Finding A Silver Lining” and this regarding The Oak Leaf at the month and week and year of 2004 after my vision quest, as several others were additionally. However only further discussions were with my ex-father-in-law retired E7 James Walker Nichols per the more in depth factors, as he had experiences I wrote about in “Finding A Silver Lining” out in Chandler Mountain in the state of Alabama and he and I were capable to connect in discussions about such situations. I was and still am thankful and grateful for the many hours of discussions that I had with him per the military factors in addition to the discussions about The Oak Leaf, though it would have been great to have discussed my SCUBA Diving with him also since his military background would be of some similarities since he was a Drill Sergeant in Alabama and Fort Polk Louisiana after he survived his four volunteer tours in Vietnam.



I had informed the doctors at Wilford Hall about this situation in Neurology in trying to hope that there was a medical reason for what I experienced, and the doctor only took notations telling me he wanted me to calm down and when I was ready to discuss or if I needed to write; because he said that he “knew it was a difficult time for [me] and if the government needed more information [I] would know the correct timing for [me] to be comfortable to focus on the larger and more important details”. At Brooke Army Medical Center at that time in the year of 2004 when I informed Major Grimes before it became San Antonio Medical Center, she and the Neuropsychologist also said similar in response. At this point in time reviewing now in the year of 2023, I am guessing it was because of the overloading of soldiers they had per the influx of the medical boards at the time since it was in the midst of the beginning years of the Iraq and Afghanistan Wars per the difference of when such ended in the year of 2021. That was shortly before my full retirement approval from the Temporary Retirement Duty Leave or Temporary Duty Retirement Leave or TDRL, to determine the real life situations that I had tried to hold onto hope that my headaches and migraines could be fixed and repaired back then. The reality of the subarachnoid hemorrhage in the frontal lobe of my brain was still in the MRI and the CAT scans, and I asked them if that was the cause of the sweat lodge vision quest results. Each informed me my medical had nothing too do with the experience as far as they could tell at that point in time, though in my journal blog The Ornery PSA in the years of 2020 and 2021 I review several factors though mainly in reference to the exact specifics per the differences as each post explained.



When he and I discussed The Oak Leaf the overall discussions were amongst the following information in conjunction to this particular chapter per the specifics that I have clarified though also additional points that he and I had not fully went into the discussions of, though was around the heavier timeframe he started to delve into the history background of his lineage and also religious backgrounds that he and I discussed heavily of the occurrence of The Oak Leaf:



I was sitting in dismay of the floating and how there was nothing attached to The Oak Leaf yet when I pulled upon The Oak Leaf to move it up and down as well as side to side, it floated back into the same position of where I first saw it. When I placed three fingers onto The Oak Leaf to move it, The Oak Leaf seemingly illuminated more and it startled me at first before I went to move The Oak Leaf. It had not illuminated brighter when I moved my hands around it though it had illuminated brighter when I first touched The oak Leaf, and it frightened me immediately. I hesitated to touch The Oak Leaf a second time or possibly even three or four or five times before I proverbially grew a pair to hold onto The oak Leafe to move it upward, and then I released my gentle grip when it floated back to the original position prior to repeating in a downward movement and the same exact responses from The oak Leaf. When I timidly touched The oak Leaf to move it towards the left or towards the right, the same responses were per the other directions. I then did so in diagonal movements and circular movements, and The Oak Leaf returned to the same position each and every individual time. When I got to the point of repeating to move The Oak Leaf upwards, is when I saw the figure in the shadows.



I released The Oak Leaf and scurried back into my tent in fear, and I used my sleeping bag to cover myself in fear. I looked back towards the back patio and house in San Antonio Texas, trying to convince myself it was a prank that my children’s biological father was pulling. Yet, there was no illumination from the viewpoint of any windows or doorway to the house, the back patio light was the only illumination at the time beyond the reflection of the light sources from the street lamps and other houses on the street to the left of the way my tent entrance faced. The neighbor’s yard was illuminated dimly and darkly the same as it was the evening previously and all other prior evenings, and that terrified me further to see the shadow of the figure because it was not oof a size that my children’s shapes were capable to reproduce nor could their biological father reproduce the shape or the size of the figure.



I started to tear and shed many tears in a massive panic attack, and great amount of fear.



I used my sleeping bag to wipe my tears from the frightening sensations and the knowledge that everywhere I searched looking in the backyard, there was no other figure of a being whether human such per myself or whatever I saw in the entire backyard at the moment. I frantically search the areas through the side windows of the tent, slowly unzipping the rain fly areas trying to hope to find my children’s biological father at that point. The illumination from The Oak Leaf grew brighter and I could hear a humming or buzzing sound when I searched through the windows, though to no avail.



I looked through the fabric of the tent itself trying to hope that it was a prank, that somewhere was a group of individuals playing a practical joke. Yet again, to no avail.



Panicking and in search the eastern areas since I aligned the tent facing the northern direction, and there was only the darkness with only the illumination of the street lamps. However the street lamps began to illuminate brighter before getting to a certain point, then dimming, and repeating in whatever directions I looked. Similar to dance club lights, though without the rotation of the light direction, the street lamps and the houses in the nearby portion of the neighborhood continued to do so. Some lights flickered an amount of times I did not count before the gradual progression of illumination brighter, and some lights only gradually illuminated to swiftly dim to then gradually illuminate brighter. I could not point out the specifics per each house at that time now without seeing, or even possibly if I were to see.



Admittedly typing about this now in the year of 2023 in the month of October, still brings up nervous sensations however it is easier now than it was before to type about. To admit how much fear I had when searching for any form of human life beyond myself at the times when I had discussed such, I only internally sensed shame because of whomever was around since they had graduated Basic Training and graduated AIT or what the fields of employment are per the branches and divisions. Too admit being meek is one factor, to admit full fledge fear and not having graduated Basic Training at the minimum was a heavy cross to bear amongst such males and females during those years of 2004 and 2005 especially in reference to speaking with my ex-father-in-law Grandpa Nichols. Intimidated is the proverbial tip of the iceberg for such factors for a one word way to describe such sensations when attempting to inform about the situation, since he had done his employment so well to have survived four tours of Vietnam and to be in such awe of the strength and wit to do so. Pulling myself up through my proverbial bootstraps was the only option I had, and the only option I have to give such information.



When I looked in each quadrant direction, the lights continued to illuminate further and dim to then reilluminate for whatever the length of time I sought to search. The closest description of how disorienting it was would be to have the pupil dilation and then go to a dance club immediately afterwards, then whatever attempts that could be made at the dance club to read a posting or a text message while at the club for the reference of what the disorientation was for me to attempt looking through the tent that evening and the ways the lights were illuminating from the houses and thee street lamps. At a point in time I remember forgetting The Oak Leaf had been the starting point that scared me because of the amounts of illuminations in the overall surrounding areas, including overhead. :I had seen through the Sycamore tree branches the flickers oof lights that looked similar to Christmas lights twinkling through the tree branches when I looked upwards, and since I had not went through SCUBA Diving classes, there also were not any bubbles for me to search for. However the screen from the open rain fly that evening was the closest that I could find a direction of knowingly to be capable to orient myself of the directions, when I saw The Oak Leaf float into my tent as I was leaning against the back wall slightly while clutching to my childhood remanence of the teddy bear and my sleeping bag.



I had wiped so many tears from my eyes the red sleeping bag fabric had turned to a maroon coloration when The Oak Leaf floated into the four to six person red and white tent doorway, and I briefly stopped breathing because of my fear. I started hiccupping at that point in time I can remember, because I recall thinking to myself “That is supposed to be how you get rid of hiccups is scarring someone, I did not know I could get hiccups from being a scared little baby over an oak leaf.”

Comments

Couldn’t Load Comments
It looks like there was a technical problem. Try reconnecting or refreshing the page.

Remember, since I was either six or seven years old I have been giving warnings as to the best of my ability as to the visions I had which began when I was in second grade of Elementary school.  The first warning I gave officially as to my nightmare vision compared to my dream vision was in the year of 1988 or 1989, compared to the online writings and my books as well as my journal blog entries year timeline for the information.


If anyone is upset please direct your upset towards those who had made the choices to constantly needlessly block my warnings and/or try to explain otherwise as to their trying to curb their responsibilities, in comparison to the responsible and respectful choices as best as I could possibly do so as a child starting as to such information at the age of when I was six in 1988 or seven years old in 1989.


I made every attempt to inform as best as I possibly could, though hopefully the clarifications throughout my various books and writings as well as journal blog entries compared to the amount of people in multiple areas which I had spoken with about in person from the years of 1988 or 1989 through to 2012 more continuously before 2013. 


In the year of 2019 is when I began reviewing such details and onward through the years since 2019 more officially, however I made the attempts to give the warnings and what others' choices have been as to whatever proof thereof to who you should be speaking with as to what they told you in comparison as to the upset and anger with in comparison.


How many assistances I have made attempt towards betterment as to the clarifications from the year of 1988 or 1989 onward did it truly have to take for each to genuinely pay attention, as I have been making the best attempts to assist for the best possibilities how?

REMEMBER:

After the head injury caused a coma while I learned how to deal with the headaches, migraines, cognitive disorders, memory problems, and other medical conditions I went from College Algebra with Trigonometry & Calculus down to 2nd grade math.  Here is how logic works for someone like me::

~  It took awhile for the doctor's recommendation to use sticky notes, to help remember.

~  It took several months to realize sticky notes moved, let alone to remember to speak with the doctor.

~  After I finally remembered to ask the doctor about the note problem, notebooks were recommended.

~  When I could remember to pick up a notebook, it took a long time to learn similar to sticky notes, notebooks are not always where they were placed.

~  After I was able to organize the notebooks over several months I still had not learned notebooks are not always readily available, at the necessary time.

~  When I remembered to speak with the doctor about the notebook problem the doctor had few other suggestions, to assist memories better.

~  After several events and adding up sticky note and notebook location problems, I realized my skin goes everywhere I do.

~  Wanting my tattoos to only be for me and not for public consumption I started the ink on my legs, able to hide easier.

~  It would not be until many tattoos and several years later I would realize my memory problems were usually not as bad when wearing shorts, capri pants, or a skirt.

~  Between 3-5 years after my first tattoo I had the first tattoo completed on my arms, and my memory has slowly progressed towards an easier memory jolt.

 

 

When I say "it should not take a head injury to figure this out" it is partially in humor from personal experiences, towards understanding.

 

If I can laugh at my mistakes after recognizing and dealing with them, so can you.

 

You have the knowledge, understanding, and wisdom I lack in order to put everything together to fix the problems seen with abilities I do not have. 

Utilize the information within the blog to find genuine repairs and instead of complaining of the "hurtful" commentary, prevent the issues from reoccurring.

Then again, it should not take a head injury to figure that one out.

Do make sure to link my journal blog entry articles to yours if you refer to my works for any of your research in the slightest, for proper credit. 

 

Thank you, in advance.

REMEMBER:

After the head injury caused a coma while I learned how to deal with the headaches, migraines, cognitive disorders, memory problems, and other medical conditions I went from College Algebra with Trigonometry & Calculus down to 2nd grade math.  Here is how logic works for someone like me::

~  It took awhile for the doctor's recommendation to use sticky notes, to help remember.

~  It took several months to realize sticky notes moved, let alone to remember to speak with the doctor.

~  After I finally remembered to ask the doctor about the note problem, notebooks were recommended.

~  When I could remember to pick up a notebook, it took a long time to learn similar to sticky notes, notebooks are not always where they were placed.

~  After I was able to organize the notebooks over several months I still had not learned notebooks are not always readily available, at the necessary time.

~  When I remembered to speak with the doctor about the notebook problem the doctor had few other suggestions, to assist memories better.

~  After several events and adding up sticky note and notebook location problems, I realized my skin goes everywhere I do.

~  Wanting my tattoos to only be for me and not for public consumption I started the ink on my legs, able to hide easier.

~  It would not be until many tattoos and several years later I would realize my memory problems were usually not as bad when wearing shorts, capri pants, or a skirt.

~  Between 3-5 years after my first tattoo I had the first tattoo completed on my arms, and my memory has slowly progressed towards an easier memory jolt.

 

 

When I say "it should not take a head injury to figure this out" it is partially in humor from personal experiences, towards understanding.

 

If I can laugh at my mistakes after recognizing and dealing with them, so can you.

 

You have the knowledge, understanding, and wisdom I lack in order to put everything together to fix the problems seen with abilities I do not have. 

Utilize the information within the blog to find genuine repairs and instead of complaining of the "hurtful" commentary, prevent the issues from reoccurring.

Then again, it should not take a head injury to figure that one out.

Do make sure to link my journal blog entry articles to yours if you refer to my works for any of your research in the slightest, for proper credit. 

 

Thank you, in advance.

Model Author Susan MeeLing

It should not take a head injury to figure this out because I thought you are supposed, to be smarter.

If there are those who find such interesting enough to research further to bring forward more information in reference to the forefront for more detailed information, as usual I request the courtesy of the same which I do in reference to how I refer to articles for reference points when writing my journal blog entries; for each one used for reference starting points, to research for clearer understanding from such knowledge.

 

That is common sense, good etiquette, and good karma; whilst lifting others upward, in positive ways.

Quotes which mean a lot to me:

"The ultimate measure of an individual is not where they stand in moments of comfort and convenience, but where they stand at the time of challenge and controversy."

"We must reject the idea that every time a law is broken society is guilty, rather than the law breaker.  Freedom is never-more than one generation away, from extinction.  We do not pass freedom on through our blood stream because freedom must be fought for, protected, and handed on for the next generation to do the same."

"Happiness is when what you think, what you say, and what you do are in harmony.  Though best to be able to share in person with who matters, until that time occurs being able to see what is possible through such is a feat to notice.  One must be happy within oneself prior to being happy with another, though such can be enjoyed if living in one's own truth is as such. and then as to the capability to progress forward with another and/or others depending upon the situation(s) and individual(s)."  ~  A Quote From Me, Reverend Susan MeeLing also known as Lady Dori Belle

Me in Black Suit Prepared.JPG

If in anyway I am inaccurate about anything I have written here in this journal blog entry and/or any prior journal blog entry and/or future journal blog entry and/or factual books I wrote and/or videos I have done through my OFFICIAL YouTube Channel Reverend MeeLing, please only contact me through the contact form for the ability to clarify such details in public view fully to fix and repair to rectify the situation(s) as I do not respond to comments in my journal blogs because there thus far have not been any notifications sent to me about such from my website.


In such references if there are any inaccuracies then I will fix and repair such details on my website, as per such.


Though there are the aspects of which if you would like to speak with me in addition to possibilities of opportunities for me, the welcome aspects as to contacting me through my contact form.



If I have known you in person when in person in positive ways and/or ways which might need clarification(s) as to mature discussions, there has always been the welcome open door policy as to contacting me through my contact form if you were not given my new phone number though such is online regarding my website more recently published online as to my Website Business Phone Line: (360)-713-4937.

Thus far there has been only one who has known the contact form area to speak with me on a phone line was simple and capable to do so through, in truth.

Amazon Author Pages: 

amazon.com/author/susanmeeling

Twitter: 

@RevSusanMeeLing

@MeelingSusan

Instagram:

@lady_dori_belle

@wwwsusanmeelingcom

Facebook: 

facebook.com/L.D.Belle

                     facebook.com/LadyDoriBelle

Fetlife:

https://fetlife.com/users/484330

YouTube:

Reverend MeeLing

The Ornery PSA

Amazon Author Pages: 

amazon.com/author/susanmeeling

Twitter: 

@RevSusanMeeLing

@MeelingSusan

Instagram:

@wwwsusanmeelingcom

Facebook: 

facebook.com/L.D.Belle

                   https://www.facebook.com/FindingASilverLiningSML

 

https://www.facebook.com/LadyDoriBelle/

 

https://www.facebook.com/ReverendSusanMeeLing/ 

Fetlife as Lady Liberty Belle:

https://fetlife.com/users/484330

Subscribe to my YouTube Channel!

Reverend MeeLing

The Ornery PSA

https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCMzYhG_sQtZJul4nMbpatyw

bottom of page