If in anyway I am inaccurate about anything I have written here in this journal blog entry and/or any prior journal blog entry and/or future journal blog entry and/or factual books I wrote and/or videos I have done through my OFFICIAL YouTube Channel Reverend MeeLing, please do contact me through the contact form for the ability to clarify such details in public view fully to fix and repair to rectify the situation(s).

The Ornery P.S.A.

(Public Service Announcement)



It should not take a head injury

*after personally sustaining a head injury & coma*

to figure this out...









A Satirical Blog

*(utilizing articles discussing facts)*

By:  Susan MeeLing

After the head injury caused a coma while I learned how to deal with the headaches, migraines, cognitive disorders, memory problems, and other medical conditions I went from College Algebra with Trigonometry & Calculus down to 2nd grade math.  Here is how logic works for someone like me::

~  It took awhile for the doctor's recommendation to use sticky notes, to help remember.

~  It took several months to realize sticky notes moved, let alone to remember to speak with the doctor.

~  After I finally remembered to ask the doctor about the note problem, notebooks were recommended.

~  When I could remember to pick up a notebook, it took a long time to learn similar to sticky notes, notebooks are not always where they were placed.

~  After I was able to organize the notebooks over several months I still had not learned notebooks are not always readily available, at the necessary time.

~  When I remembered to speak with the doctor about the notebook problem the doctor had few other suggestions, to assist memories better.

~  After several events and adding up sticky note and notebook location problems, I realized my skin goes everywhere I do.

~  Wanting my tattoos to only be for me and not for public consumption I started the ink on my legs, able to hide easier.

~  It would not be until many tattoos and several years later I would realize my memory problems were usually not as bad when wearing shorts, capri pants, or a skirt.

~  Between 3-5 years after my first tattoo I had the first tattoo completed on my arms, and my memory has slowly progressed towards an easier memory jolt.



When I say "it should not take a head injury to figure this out" it is partially in humor from personal experiences, towards understanding.


If I can laugh at my mistakes after recognizing and dealing with them, so can you.


You have the knowledge, understanding, and wisdom I lack in order to put everything together to fix the problems seen with abilities I do not have. 

Utilize the information within the blog to find genuine repairs and instead of complaining of the "hurtful" commentary, prevent the issues from reoccurring.

Then again, it should not take a head injury to figure that one out.

Do make sure to link my journal blog entry articles to yours if you refer to my works for any of your research in the slightest, for proper credit.  Thank you in advance, as I do as I request.

I knew better though some may need to know, stolen valor is wrong and should be punishable

This morning I woke up as normal as in this time for what is going on, though normal for me despite the irony of normal not being so. As I thought to myself before getting out of bed and as I remembered as best as I could; looking around I had to recall the fact I was not where I once was, yet again. That is a daily aspect for me and anytime I lay down to rest for whatever reason, is something I go through each and every time. My thoughts have to realign with everything and the aspects of which to then be reminded of the #COVID aspect is not helpful for a multitude of reasons well beyond the headaches and migraines that worsen when wearing a mask the few times I have done so begrudgingly which does not assist the pain levels at all. Not forgetting the aspects of the COVID and seeing people in masks does not assist the memory problems I deal with continuously, as that in its own aspect is a problem for my memory issues which admittedly is extremely annoying. The more the mask aspect continues the more it makes me want to get out of the state of #Texas each time I see someone in public wearing a mask when I go out or as today was as it confuses me as to a lot of different aspects in regards to things in life in a multitude of ways, as well as feeling weirder to go leave to go anywhere for various additional aspects.

Honestly it has gotten to the point of which I have thought about going to another state that does not force people to wear masks just to be able to try to find some normalcy instead of the stuff that I see when I actually do go outside to go somewhere, and it causes me to wonder why I made the effort to return while affecting my memory issues and the problems thereof. The fact there have been fewer associated aspects to the COVID to add to that aspect is frustratingly annoying on top of the problems to my memory issues, and then there are the headaches and migraines to which elevate more quickly than a pregnant female gets morning sickness when smelling anything.

Yet I am reminded of the aspects of which I needed to take care of in reference to a few things, another part of me thinks about the fact I can complete my artwork elsewhere and then get a car to return when the pieces are done instead of going out and seeing so many people wearing masks. At this point it almost seems as though that is a preference in others ways since returning back to the state of Texas in regards of wearing masks and not being themselves, in an energetic aspect of from other viewpoints in various regards. At minimum that is what I have picked up on in regards of certain individuals who wrongly prefer to cover up as the COVID so-called pandemic seems nothing more than a political ploy to ease the loss to the Democrats for the Presidential election for the United States of America again in 2020 as occurred in 2016, which is not going to help in the long term how everything is viewed for either side of the political aisle for the willing participation of such of whatever area the aspects were agreed to.

In brief what it will show is there were people who genuinely listened and there were people who listened and became fearful, while those in the political aspects pushed forward the portions of while the elections was going on and the normal timeline of events for centuries previous was disrupted to find out there was not the amount of problems as bad as initially stated. Those who genuinely listened will be seen as the thought and intellectuals whereas the ones who listened and became fearful will be known as placebos work for every little ailment, depending of the length of time each person had been in whichever aspect of. Those who are in the political aspects will be known for what was and was not done, and the election year similar to other major elections which have gone awry throughout the short time the United States of America has been in the world as such a name have continued throughout to be known of simply because of the Presidential debates not having occurred in the manner they should have at this point in time of 18 September 2020.

Can I see the ability to bring forward the other electoral aspects to the forefront for more people in the local and state level to know about and discuss among more people so the President and the Vice President of the United States of America are not blamed for every little thing that occurs, in a bigger way? Yes, I can. To go through this level of whatever terminology is preferred, is problematic in such for a multitude of reasons.

First, why would it take to this point for so many people to not realize how important it is to know that the President and the Vice President of the United States of America work with others throughout to get things done in reference to legislation? Why does it have to take this much for people to realize that it is not only the President and Vice President of the United States of America who make the decisions of what goes into bills and laws, however it is those throughout the local and state levels before the federal aspects while sometimes the federal aspect makes the bigger decisions comparatively? Another reason though in a different aspect as to why I personally believe if an individual wants to be #Commander and Co-Commander in Chief of the #UnitedStatesofAmerica's #ArmedForces as President and of the of the United States of America should have a background within the military, as a mandatory prerequisite as when #GeneralGeorgeWashington became President of the United States of America with his Vice President as well as the first few President and Vice Presidents of the United States of America, they all had military backgrounds because of fighting in the #RevolutionaryWar.

There were not many who did not have a background in such back when the United States of America was founded and though some of the #FoundingMothers warned of several points back then of which the #FoundingFathers did not believe there would ever be a time when there would be anyone who would ever be in charge of the military branches of the United States of America in any office which would be in command of such, though they had heeded the warnings from the Founding Mothers who were for the best interest of the United States of America's successes.

For a quick example if you do not go through the election process as a Sherriff you have a specific amount of time to graduate to become a Sherriff and though I have opinions on that particular aspect in reference to if the individual does not successfully complete the coursework such as with-holding the finances until after graduation for the salary of being the elected Sherriff in charge for example, the aspects of being Commander in Chief of the Armed Forces of the United States of America I believe should have some background in such; whether attending a military academy in youth, being a part of the military in active duty/national guard/reservist status at some point and as a veteran can run for such a role, as the understanding of such portions in my opinion is extremely important for the individuals throughout the various branches. However there were fail-safes put into place in the religious and spiritual aspects of back then to ensure if there ever came a day for such. Though I do not have proof of such sorts of ceremonial aspects, I also doubt there are not any such aspects as the country was founded on religious freedoms and thus there is an underlying aspect of such already implied in my opinion well beyond the ceremonies which remind me of ceremonial magickal aspects of various religious and spiritual portions of old.

However returning to the portions in reference to the aspects of the masking in regards of the COVID in turn also those who have gone to the extreme of causing problems for people who either understand the situation and/or have medical issues and problems which cannot tolerate the portions of wearing a mask for extended periods of time if at all without causing further complications to their medical issues and problems, is also what will be noted for the portions of time throughout. Just as the previous aspects of that which has been done and seen, what they have done which they cannot hide from what their pasts are. While such is important to know and understand the process, why has it gotten to the point of this where more have not known compared to those who have known?

On a different point which was the original intent of writing this journal blog entry had been in such waking up and having to go through the aspects of re-remembering, there had been a point in time which the male who wound up taking my son and I to Washington state after the initial meeting at the #CowboysDanceHall in #SanAntonio #Texas beyond just that had been a few additional unnecessary issues and problems. Aside from what was already occurring in reference of my daughter, my son, and I because of what happened in reference to the treatment at the public school of McCoy Elementary in Carrollton Texas of Carrollton Farmers Branch Independent School District and having to do the best I possibly could to ensure the best overall outcome for both of them, others, and myself as I knew back then my children and I were not the only ones who had endured such previously; then the problematic issues which occurred because of the group of people who would not leave me alone at the concert for Stoney LaRue which I simply was wanting to relax even for a brief bit of time obviously was not possible at that time because of the annoyances from Kevin and his group of friends with his wife and her friends egging him on knowing what he was going to do to a female who was at a dance club by herself.

That was explained to me after the situation with the San Antonio Police Department officers when at Cowboys Dance Hall by Kevin's friend Jesse Leroy Hoover Jr, my now ex-boyfriend on that night against the brick wall. I had been told of Kevin's attempts previously and how I was the first female who ever stood up for myself against Kevin's antics as the only other female who did something to stand up for herself was throw a drink in his face; in comparison to using words, as well as being ready to stand up for such without hesitation. He said he had never seen anyone defend the Police either, at that point; however I did not understand as to why, nor the big deal of in such. Now in 2020 compared to back then in 2013, I can see the references made from that amount of time. The situation also occurred shortly after being told by the Child Protective Services workers to contact my ex-sister-in-law to attempt to get assistance from her in regards of my daughter, and after the response from Mary Evongelina Nichols Osteen about my daughter's situation which had nothing to do with the actual situation at hand; I received no answers which were assistive to my daughter, my son, or I though the Cowboys Dance Hall Stoney LaRue concert was just a little bit of time from that contact in March of 2013.

Despite how my son and I wound up in Washington state after meeting my ex-boyfriend Jesse Leroy Hoover Jr who claimed to have gotten out of the United States of America's #AirForce branch of the Armed Forces in 2006 and saying he was stationed at #ElmendorfAirForceBase in #Alaska during the attacks on 11 September 2001 which is where his initial plan to take my son and I had been was to Alaska driving through Canada, there was a different situation in which I had to calm myself down. Now remembering there had been an argument which that male was driving my car during an argument and because I refused to argue in front of my son who was in the backseat of the car as I told Jesse Leroy Hoover Jr my ex-boyfriend to turn the car around to go back to the house in #Tacoma, he sped the car up in anger and I simply opened the car door and rolled out. I stood up, brushed the gravel and glass off of me, and began walking back to the house in Lakewood to discuss whatever the argument was about as he inevitably turned the car around to attempt to get me to get back in the car.

I saw a male who saw the me roll out from the passenger side of the car as it was during the turning curve which I waved and nodded my head at one of the males who was standing outside of his house or his friend's house who looked at me with big eyes, and after I waved and nodded he reciprocated seemingly a big taken aback for whatever reason. I walked back to the house and my now ex-boyfriend followed in the car, to then discuss the situation and have a conversation at the house as my son went to go play with some friends instead of going to the store as initially was to do.

After getting my son squared away and then beginning the discussion of the argument my now ex-boyfriend asked me why I left the vehicle and did not like the response I gave of "I told you I am not willing to argue in front of my son and you refused to turn the car around while yelling at me, and so since you would not do as I asked; I did the only thing I could think of, to get out of the situation." The same had been in reference of my daughter, when I was able to have her and my son together when they were younger. I dealt with many conversations from my now dead-ex-husband because he wanted my children to watch, and I simply would not allow such. I dealt with what I dealt with, so my children did not have to see and hear those conversations as best as I could; as Washington state had not been the first time I had been locked and kept in a room for standing up for what was correct and right, despite what I dealt with in reference to the consequences for keeping my children safe as best as I could; though hopefully is the last time I ever have to deal with that as between the randomness of the years in Washington state from 2014 through 2018 for that in addition to from 2003 through 2007, that was unnecessary and unneeded for only defending my children despite the other aspects of not completing dinner the right way or whatever excuses were at the time.

In certain ways with the lockdown and etcetera, it seems like such in a different though a bigger way for more than just me comparatively to those times in a different aspect of. Though not the same exact way and aspect of, there are certain similarities which feel as such in reference to the combination in different ways and various viewpoints for me.

He asked me if I knew how fast he sped the car speed up to and I shook my head signaling no when he told me something and going back to the points in reference of the car situation as that point the speed had been around 25 or 35 miles per hour when rolling out from the car of which then I looked at myself and saw there were no rips in my clothes, and no scratches or bruises then or afterwards. Later in the week when going to volunteer and speaking with some of the guys when they asked me about my week, I told them about that situation while laughing. They at one point asked why I was laughing which I told them that I was guaranteed any discussion would not happen in a car again if there was a problem, though I was mainly laughing because the male who I saw seemed confused as to what he just saw; which was funny to me, because I did not think it was that big of a deal.

Realistically, I survived after having landed at the bottom of the ocean next the the Vandenberg as well as beneath that level which it is sitting on to surface safely and live. At this point the last thing I care about is a car going 25 or 35 miles per hour and jumping out from it as I did not have a scratch on me from doing so. There are people who have survived worse than jumping out of a car at that speed and though not having landed where I had at the bottom of the ocean in each area I had, there are still people who have survived a faster moving vehicle jump and survived living to tell about such. A quick example which though far from the same as to what they did there are those who have completed #Airborne training as well as #AirAssuult repelling training, as well as other types of such in the military and law enforcement; though yes, those guys usually have had a parachute comparatively, though there are other guys who have completed portions in reference to vehicles in regards of cars/trucks/SUVs I think.

One of the males told me "It is probably not everyday he sees someone roll out of a moving car that is speeding up" which I shrugged my shoulders, and walked off after telling them "My son was taken care of and safe, which is what mattered to me at the time. I lived and am alive, so it is what it is." Since I have not heard from nor know of whether or not my son and my daughter are safe, that is a different aspect at this point in time.

How does this pertain to the waking up aspect and the timing thereof, some might wonder. Quite simply I guesstimate that if at the time of that situation similarly to others if there had been an understanding of and memory aspects as well; I probably would have thought to ask certain questions, and/or would have remembered certain prior situations I had dealt with in reference of my dead-ex-husband in regards of the treatment I went through. There had been a time which my now dead-ex-husband had gotten so mad at me that he rushed my hips while running and pushed m upward before gravity took over and I landed on the concrete path feet, legs, buttox, back, shoulders, and then my head. I know I was left in the backyard unconscious for hours as I was told later when my now dead-ex-husband had sat on my chest to get me to wake up after the people in the lab told him to go back to my house in San Antonio to check on me, which he also told me my biological mother and father were in the front yard when he arrived and he had told them what he did to me; which my biological mother and my biological father said they would have done worse to me, if they had the chance.

However I suppose they forgot about how I was treated, when being raised by them when I was a child. The situations which I can remember from my childhood are the kinder times of my childhood, which realistically when thinking about such are not all that fluffy comparatively. Though the question hypothetically could be would it not be considered as worse prior to such telling me in utero and throughout my childhood and teenage years that they wished I had been like one of the prior abortions or miscarriages my biological mother had, along with my biological sister being the planned and the favorite?

Would it be considered worse that I had to cook my on my own for everyone else but did not get to eat until each had their first and second portions of food, if there ever were any leftovers as a child? Or would it be considered worse of what my biological mother allowed to occur knowing of such to me, or worse to blame me for begin assaulted as a teenager after what had already occurred? Possibly it could be considered worse to have an abusive individual tell exactly what was done and not care enough at that particular moment in time, and instead take the abuser's side in the front yard of my house as discussing such as my biological parents. Is it worse to have had money taken out of my accounts from my biological mother or is it worse that she cared so little for me as well as my two children, because they had been given life by me?

Maybe someone might agree about certain points thereof, or some of the other aspects I survived from that set of people.

Though I had written about what more could one person do to me that would be worse than what I experienced all by themselves without the assistance from others compared to my dead-ex-husband, that was not a challenge. That statement was made for people to reevaluate how they themselves treat others to be in a more positive, caring, and loving way instead of going to that type of extreme. If considered as a challenge, the challenge should have been how much better can you treat others instead comparatively. How much kinder could you be, and how many aspects of betterment could you achieve? What good could you genuinely do in the world for yourself, others, and the overall? While I guesstimate some were able to pick that up and realize such, I also guesstimate there were others who sought the other direction instead.

Again, I wonder why I returned to the state of Texas in certain references and then am reminded of such. However the irony, I will inevitably forget again because of the after effects of my Psalm Sunday 2000 head injury. Nonetheless the aspects of which in reference of my ex-boyfriend Jesse Leroy Hoover Jr who lived in the house with my son and I in Tacoma/#Lakewood #Washington had given me a picture he said was from when he was in Officer Basic Training school when at #LacklandAirForceBase of #JBSA, and when I returned to the state of Texas there was a point I had stopped by the legal center to discuss a few aspects. When there I had shown the airmen from the Air Force the picture to the right of the two of which Jesse Leroy Hoover Jr had given to me saying it was from that schooling for Officers. The males told me that was an incorrect representation of the United States of America's Air Force as well as Officer School does not occur at Lackland Air Force Base.

The picture on the left was taken at an event in #Portland #Oregon for #Halloween in 2013 which I briefly put the mask on for the picture, which there was another incident which occurred at that event in regards of a female who had an outfit like what I was wearing, though she did not have any of the weaponry I had for the event. When taking pictures with her and the other females that female dressed in an outfit like mine asked if she could hold one of my weapon fans which I told her no, and she was upset about the fact I would not share my weapons for her to take a picture with. However now in 2020 if the aspects in regards of the female dressed in an outfit like mine as well as the fact Jesse Leroy Hoover Jr seemed to know a few people from that group is a bit of a coinky dink, that is something else to look into. I had arrived at the event in an #Eeyore pajama as the weather is colder in Oregon and Washington state; which would be why the change of costume occurred, inside of the event. Jesse Leroy Hoover Jr had urged me to go for the costume contest for singles and instead of a single person winning that contest a couple who entered the wrong competition category had been labeled as the winners instead of any of the other people who were dressed in individual costumes for the category. However that was pointed out to me, after I got off of the stage; which obviously no one can see my leg tattoos, which would be distinguishing marks for those who know/knew me prior to when I wound up in Washington state for the event in Portland Oregon during Halloween in 2013.

I doubt the individuals in the Air Force do not know what an #Officer graduate picture is supposed to look like for someone who has graduated from Officer Basic Training School and thus if anyone is told by the male in the pictures of such an aspect, I guesstimate the airmen at the Air Force Base knew and know what that uniform and picture is supposed to look as much better than I. Also there was an evening which the theme was uniforms at a club I went to in #Seattle Washington and I made a joke about getting into the pants at the club one way or another, which a former United States of America' #Navy seaman had noticed the BDU pattern and asked why I was wearing #DesertStorm patterned uniform attire with modifications for the outfit. I told him of the discussion which I realize now, Desert Strom was not a recent event and the BDU pattern would not have been used in the timeframe discussed by my ex-boyfriend who had been at the #Cowboys #Dancehall when that targeting had occurred unbeknownst to me. The outfit I was wearing in the picture above on the left, was fun for the evening. However the other aspects of the metallic material being elective conductions for the areas where the fabric was laying was not fun in the slightest, as I was already dealing with enough pain at the time. The weight of the headband and the mask alone was painful though adding the additional electrical charges to the headband, the mask, and the outfit itself, was excruciatingly horrid.

Also, I have not heard from my son in over a year since he said he was getting out of the United States of America's Army branch of the #ArmedForces which I would appreciate it if the possibility to speak with my son as well as my daughter was no longer a problem. Keeping my son and my daughter from contacting me and my ability to contact them, is not something which makes me feel comfortable in the slightest. Thus if possible and as soon as possible, I would appreciate the ability to speak with my son and my daughter without any further hesitations. Whatever the excuses are at this point is not helpful to me, not that such has been for awhile. I will not calm down without speaking with my children, as I know myself and how I am. This is the last picture I have of my son and I together the day he left for the Army Basic Training from Washington in Seattle, in 2019. I have reached out to multiple individuals, groups, and agencies about a multitude of aspects and have yet to get any word back from any of them about the progress of the different portions of. I am not in a good mood, and it is so much better when I am in a good mood. I guesstimate that has been figured out, by now.

Unlike some individuals who have had the luxury of being with their children as they grew up after having an actual childhood, I have not known anything in greater detail before my Psalm Sunday 2000 head injury as can be noticed by the previous journal blog entry. I only know what I have had since waking up from the coma from my Psalm Sunday 2000 head injury which is having the ability to take care of my son and my daughter while living as best as I could. I have taken care of plenty of situations though while being a Mom, and taking my source of balance from me because of others' choices is not acceptable obviously. Again I can make a joke about it being called #MotherNature, and thus the sooner I am able to calm down through speaking with my son and my daughter will be the better.

I hope each and every individual who has prevented such over the time of the beginning of the problems at McCoy elementary School of Carrollton Texas and including such in reference to how I wound up in Washington state as well as causing problems to my Medal of Honor Art Project understand I consider those who caused such problems to my Medal of Honor Art Project as my enemy; when not in the compassionate, honorable, and/or righteous ways to assist bringing my awareness and attention to what was occurring at the times of. I do not know in specifics though I have ideas of who might have realized well before I had, though I also know and understand now without a writeup from me of such details for furthered aspects for researching the details and backgrounds of such may not have been as easy to be able to put together in a bigger way.

I hope that all of my enemies are destroyed, fully. The sooner, the better. There has been too much suffering, for far too long.

I am not happy, nor am I comfortable, which means I am not in a good mood. Due to various aspects I have started wondering why I bothered to return to the area as I know it was to ensure certain aspects of justice were taken care of in reference to deliver the paperwork and documents as needed, though the amount of time such has taken in reference to the amount of time in years in conjunction is beyond understanding for such; though also I had not realized certain portions of prior writings would be needed or considered helpful, in bigger aspects though I had hoped such would be able to help. I truly wonder if I should have simply gone to another state instead closer to the ocean at times since returning to the state of Texas, though I also do not doubt there are certain individuals I once knew who thought such would have been better to keep their heads in the sand continuously. Not that would have stopped the problems if I had done so, correct? Such would only have been perpetuated and the needless problems would have continued instead of being able to do what was necessary, to get the information to who would have the better understanding of how to get such implemented in an easier and better way compared to just me on my own

So as I have said before, nip things in the bud. Also if such has to do with Cactus Jack AKA Jeffrey Kuykendall Jr with his friends and associates, well how ironic of having had to drive him back to San Antonio to get rid of him the first time; also how ironic of the games preferred over real life in comparison, when taking into consideration what was done in reference to his game of which I thought was terrorist activity. If hypothetically he had anything to do with additional problems to my children and I, how befitting to drive back to Texas to fully dispose of him; especially in reference to what had been done in regards of the 151 Road Warrior situation involving the #AlamoDrafthouse on 410 and 151 during the #Fiesta Texas #SanAntonio event. I wish I had known previously of how better to explain and get the information to who needed such for the aspects of, though I think at this point there might have been the equivalent of a task force team put together to monitor for such in the just in case for I think the term is called cold case information to pop up to assist. If so and if the aspects were helpful, I still feel bad I was not able to get the information to the correct areas sooner.

Others labeled me as their enemy long before I realized, now the tables have turned proverbially I suppose. I realize there are many who need to be handled, and I hope such is done so quickly and swiftly without any further hesitations. Personally I do not believe in starting wars just as I do not believe in starting fights, however I do believe in finishing them where the enemy is destroyed. Each fight that was started by others, they have been handled and now with everything that has occurred and realizing others had chosen to wage a war against mine and I; I guesstimate they did not take into consideration when I would wake up and realize their game and in such, they probably used all that they had. Now that I am aware, I am just getting started though others have been working towards such victory for longer than I have been aware of such occurring; if hypothetically, such was a situation in reference to others choices.

Nonetheless the portions in reference to the regards of quite a few aspects I simply prefer to be able to actually relax and actually enjoy my life within that aspect of the relationship in romance and whatnot of the sort, instead of the constant struggles that have been. It sickens and annoys me to levels which are disgraceful for so many things and situations to have occurred in such manners for so long, in which I simply do no care much about quite a few things. I have been so desensitized to the problems throughout that it would actually be surprising to actually be involved in a relationship involving the portions of love and romance in such ways I have heard about, seen, and previously dreamt of actually being able to be for me. However with such aspects as of current times, the lack of the ability to see such occurring for me personally has become so much more prevalent that it would actually shock me to believe in such anymore.

I still hold onto a bit of hope for such to occur, however that hope has dwindled to the point of which I can barely recognize the possibility of such as a possibility. I have seen so many situations unfurl in ways which would cause most to cry in agony before the fullness of the situation, I have experienced so many situations which most would cringe at just the thought of and not actually having had gone through, I have been so jaded by so many aspects that I truly wonder if that is an actual possibility for someone with my background and my experiences. Many have told me of how cold they had thought me to be many years prior to this year of 2020 and even well before 2013 or even 2009 with the exception of towards my children; and now after so many more situations and such, I genuinely wonder how frozen in certain regards I am for such not realizing or possibly not wanting to pay attention to the realities of and when proceeding to speak of. The ability of getting to answer in response to the problems associated when discussed, was not what occurred back then and usually had been met by others' discontent for bringing up such important aspects to pay attention to. Despite the aspects of which bringing in my opinion quite valid points, the times of ignoring such are far beyond the time to continue to do so. It is pertinent to take care of more in a proper manner instead of pretending such does not exist.

I have had to accomplish much on my own and thus even furthering such, I wonder how cold my heart actually is at this point to even the slightest possibility of; while knowing and understanding while comprehending, I will always have concern and care for that which is of importance. Again overall I do believe in such and have had vivid dreams after the nightmare portions of my childhood, though in such an independent being as I am the determination I have for a multitude of aspects is extremely changed from what once was in regards of looking at situations including a loving and committed relationship. I do not want to just be used to or just be accustomed to another as that is not what I need in such sort of ways, as it has been told to me of how I have been the proverbial lone ranger many years ago well before writing about such; that was never how I wanted to live, though the situations I had been in required such as a mandatory aspect.

However such is another portion to write at another time, possibly.

The aspects which the COVID mask wearing is beyond the expiration date, and it needs to simply stop; though I can see a bit of the dichotomy in reference to the mask wearing in reference of the COVID and the mask at the Halloween event in Portland Oregon for the outfit worn, that evening. Human beings were not created to be in such turmoil so often and though life is full of curves and twists, such was not intended for the solitary existence. Technology was not intended to replace human contact, it was intended to assist keeping in touch when further distances are as they are. It is helpful for a multitude of aspects, though cannot ever replace being in closer distances. Technology was to assist with safety aspects, not to prevent the natural socialization of human beings. Technology is to assist and not to cause harm or hinder, it was meant to bring together while also helping in other ways and not just in healthcare aspects.

Though admittedly because of various aspects which I have gone through and survived, I have not denied being more of a hermit because of the situations. I also know I am not the only one who has felt as such for a multitude of reasons, however the denial of the basic human right to pursuit of happiness in my opinion such has been denied through the aspects of the COVID and the mask wearing on top of the social distancing; in addition to the problems from the after effects and disabilities from my Psalm Sunday 2000 head injury, while not forgetting what occurred after I safely landed and safely surfaced from the bottom of the ocean in the area near the Vandenberg in the Matthias Abyss during that particular SCUBA Dive. Though in such references I also see a twist of irony in reference to the name of the abyss, the water aspect, the military connection, a roadway name, my first pet when I was growing up name in addition to the name of a particular individual who I have admired for quite some time, as well as the fact my first pet back then was a dog when living in New Jersey which there is the story of the New Jersey Devil in conjunction with my favorite uniform for the United States of America's Armed Forces branch and their nickname of the Devil Dogs. It might be a bit far fetched, though the term far fetched and having to do with time with a pet is its own ironic twist in itself; while not forgetting the aspects of the far depths of the ocean in regards of the SCUBA Dive.

In conclusion while I personally have not ever even thought to steal valor or credit where I earned such and I know there are others with the same thought process, I stood against stolen valor once before in a big way; and I am ready to do so again, if necessary. Justice, will prevail for honorable victory.

It should not take a head injury to figure this out because I know, you are smarter.

If there are those who find such interesting enough to research further to bring forward more information in reference to the forefront for more detailed information, as usual I request the courtesy of the same which I do in reference to how I refer to articles for reference points when writing my journal blog entries; for each one used for reference starting points, to research.


That is common sense, good etiquette, and good karma; whilst lifting others upward, in positive ways.

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Reverend MeeLing

The Ornery PSA

Quotes which mean a lot to me:

The ultimate measure of an individual is not where they stand in moments of comfort and convenience, but where they stand at the time of challenge and controversy.

We must reject the idea that everytime a law is broken society is guilty, rather than the law breaker. 

Freedom is never-more than one generation away, from extinction.  We do not pass freedom on through our blood stream because freedom must be fought for, protected, and handed on for the next generation to do the same.

Happiness is when what you think, what you say, and what you do are in harmony.  Though best to be able to share in person with who matters, until that time occurs being able to see what is possible through such is a feat to notice.  One must be happy within oneself prior to being happy with another, though such can be enjoyed if living in one's own truth is as such.

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Thank you for taking the time to look through this website and please, enjoy your day.

Brightest blessings to all, for the highest good.

Please use the To Contact form to submit requests to hire Reverend Susan MeeLing for personal appearances for book signings, book readings, discussions, and the like if interested immediately.


If you are interested in using any of the information, videos, pictures, and etcetera of mine which I have put on my website please contact me through the To Contact form to present the details requested and we can discuss the details of and my terms and conditions if granted.  In reference of what I personally have created and am the only owner of such copyrights, of course the articles referenced with the photo-journailsm is of you to contact them for their ownership rights; though I simply post the links with my commentary of my opinions and thoughts thereof for the overall view.  I do hope those particular journalists and photo-journailsts have been able to get more work, for such within the pages; as I hope to be hired for my own.

The modeling pictures are of me and while I have images of other aspects in my journal blog entries as well as links to articles, those are those journalists' work and I have given them credit for such without taking any credits from their writings/photography/etcetera.  Hence why I posted their names, the companies the journalsts worked for at the time, and so on. 


While I did not state the photography of such were mine; again in reference of the links to the direct articles in my journal blog, being fully available to be seen as to not take credit away, from each of the photo-journalists and writers thereof. 


The same is in reference of my first book "Finding A Silver Lining By:  Susan MeeLing", in reference to credits due to each individual writing within that specifically are for legal purposes of references and for examples; in comparison to my own writings, of which are the majority of within those pages.

If you are interested in using my journal blog entries for your news station, radio broadcast, pictures, videos, artwork, and etcetera including the possibility complete an interview and/or set of, please use the To Contact form to let me know of the detailed request.  The same is in reference to the name of my journal blog The Ornery PSA if you are interested in purchasing the rights to use the name, as well as a show thereof.

My pictures from when I had modeled had been under the understanding if there were profits made from the selling of my pictures, I would receive the profits thereof.  As I have not been informed of such images being sold for profit, I thus far have not received profits from thus far. 


Though my multiple types of painting artwork is available to see on my website, any designs thereof have not been given permission to anyone to utilize nor profit from the designs I made for businesses; as that contact to me and the contracts of set profit margins to me, would need to be discussed.  That includes the paintings of mine, which includes the painted areas around each of my Medal of Honor Artwork pieces that I created by myself with my own paint.  If interested in using such, please use the To Contact page with the details thereof for possibility of approval depending upon my choice.

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