Updated: Aug 18, 2020
After a few discussions and the varying topics of, I needed to lay down because of the amount of thoughts which flooded as well as the additional pain levels which soared beyond heights I have not had in a very long amount of time. Though because instead of the ability to grumble and mumble underneath my breath to force myself to deal with things, the pain levels elevated beyond to the point; I do not remember laying down, to fall asleep However I have learned from prior experiences if I have something similar to that occur, the pain levels are so badly atrocious the smallest way to put into words of the pain levels either speaking or writing; is it feels or it felt though my head, was in a vice For those of you who do not know what a vice is beyond the term (giggling) of #VicePresident, a vice is a mechanical device which holds and object and squeezes with a portion of pressure which stabilizes the object. However when I write the words or say those words I do mean that particular item (not the Vice President of the United States of America of #VPOTUS and as a side note is it interesting how #VIP and VP as so closely written and said together *giggles*), is gripped around my head so tightly the crank which is used to tighten the grip of the vice; is squeezing tighter and tighter leaving an indentation in the object being held or flipping it out of the vice grips, because of the amount of pressure and depending upon the end tips whether the object stays or the object pops. For those who know what vice grips are you comprehend the references however for those I have met over the years, there were some I actually of who I had to explain what a vice was. I guesstimate the older generations as well as those who have had people in their lives who taught them how to use tolls, can comprehend certain aspects of that type of a discussion to those who are older than 18 years old. I had a time period in my life where at least a handful of times each weekend, I had to explain what a vice was and nine times out of ten; the person was above the age of 21.
That having been explained, I will write of the various points of which were essentially assessed and pieced in their own ways. In either 2015 or 2016 there was a news broadcast I was listening to which I contacted the #FBI about this particular individual, because the voice sounded close to what I remembered. I was not trying to cause any further problems than what was occurring in the middle east, nor cause any worse situations for anyone of The United States of America's Armed Forces or branches and divisions, but I thought maybe the FBI needed the information for a just in case. I had already written my first two books and if they had found certain connection points; this particular blog journal post might be of assistance.
The year of the #RenaissanceFaire in #Smithville of #Bastrop county in #Texas called #Excalibur had been the last year it was allowed to be in that area as that name I think in 2004 or maybe 2005, I went to the faire with Dawn, John, and Christie. I have written of the events before though not in the information connection points as I will for this particular post. Shortly after that particular set of situations I have written of before at the Excalibur Faire, Dawn had asked me to go with her to her workplace friend's birthday party at #MimiandDinas in #SanAntonio Texas near #JBSA #LacklandAirForceBase. She said "I don't want you staying at your place all by yourself, this weekend."
I told her I truly just wanted to stay at my apartment because I did not feel the need to go out, as she had wanted me to. She convinced me her friend's birthday party was going to be fun, and was going to be what was needed for me to have a good weekend. She knew I was stressed because of the first separation problems with my now dead-ex-husband and though she thought she knew me better than I know myself, she convinced me the time would be fun but quiet in comparison to the faire. I reluctantly agreed to go to the birthday part of which other employees from #JPMorgan #Chase Bank were in attendance, and as a side note of which the food was phenomenal. I asked to speak with the chef who was in the kitchen or the manager whoever was available, and there were three different people who came to talk about their food with me. We discussed how it had not been since I lived in New Jersey where the food had tasted similar to the places I would go in New Jersey and New York and for those who are into authentic cuisine, their food was so tasty and wonderfully lovely of an interior atmosphere. It had reminded me of areas I was able to go to as a child, and the three different people and I spoke for a while.
I was sat in the only available seat at the table of the two open seats as Dawn sat at the other end of the table with the employees and the only other option was next to a male named Ayaz, who was nice in the various discussions. I had asked before sitting down next to Ayaz if there was a way for people to rearrange their seating to Dawn because I only knew her at the birthday party, but she got mad at me for suggesting for me to sit next to her at the table. When I sat down next to Ayaz at the head of the multiple tables put together at the restaurant, he smiled and we briefly spoke. He asked me a few questions just before the food came to the table and he had yelled something to Dawn, several times of him being upset with her. She explained she was late because of me, and how I had gotten lost on the way to her house because she lived with her mom closer to the location of Mimi and Dina's than my apartment was at the time.
Everyone ate and later, the discussions with the people who owned and cooked at the restaurant near #Loop410 and I90. When the belly dancer came out to move among the tables and the people within the area, she came over to where I was and we had danced a little bit together. Towards the end of the time she was at the table she pulled closer to my ear and asked me "Which school, did you go to?" When I told her I had not gone to any school to learn how to belly dance, she stepped back a few feet already having had talked with me about my Psalm Sunday 2000 head injury. I felt an oddity and with such, I grabbed my purse and cigarettes to go outside.
Ayaz followed me out to the smoking section and we began talking about his schooling in #England where he had gone to a boarding school, after his parents had one of his other siblings. I asked about his parents of which he told me his dad was a #Muslim from #Bahrain and his mom was a #Hindu #Catholic from #India and I asked jokingly "Are your parents still together or did their differences cause them to go to war with one another, and your mom is at war with herself because of her religions?"
He laughed and then asked, "How did you know that, if you've never been outside of the country?"
I said, "I was just joking as there are needless problems, because of religious views. In this era, it makes no sense to me why people fight over Divinity. Divinity, just is."
He laughed and then asked me a few questions, as Dawn had not told him much about me. I told him about what I could remember from my childhood, why I joined The United States of America's Armed Forces, and my Psalm Sunday 2000 head injury. I asked him a few questions in return one of which he told me after he went to boarding school his father made him go to college and I asked jokingly "Did you go to college to become, a Petroleum Engineer?"
He dropped his cigarette to pick it up asking, "How, did you know that?"
I said, "I was just joking, and was not trying to offend you."
He laughed telling me it was difficult to offend him and I said, "Be careful, you haven't heard everything I can say, and I can speak in ways which make Marines blush."
We talked for a little bit more outside, smoking around half a pack of cigarettes combined between the two of us. When we went inside everyone was still at the table talking among themselves, and the two of us returned to the table. We all spoke among the table for a while when Dawn suggested we go to Graham Central Station and I was excited, because I like to dance. Ayaz said he was interested in going as well, and some of the group went to the dance club.
Dawn told me in the van of how she "had Herpes and it was because [her] ex-husband had cheated on [her] with their babysitter, but she chose to only tell [her] friends" when I asked "What have others have said in reference to that, do they refuse or do they mind?" She said she "did not tell people [she] was going to have sex with because of the stigma behind it" and I asked, "What are the ways to prevent transmitting that disease, as there have to be ways for people with Herpes to have sex without another person catching it." She said "I have never looked into that, I just don't want to not be able to have sex." When Dawn said that I said, "I do not think that is a smart idea because what if someone else gets that and they could have not had that problem?" She said, "It's not a big deal." I said, "I think that is a crime, you're putting others through and victimizing their sexuality." She said, "No, they choose to have sex with me that's what happens." I asked, "Do you use a condom, at least?" She asked me, "Why?" I told her "What about pregnancy? That is something if people don't want a child, that condoms help with." She said "No, not all the time." I said "Spermicidal lubricant, does." She said, "Not always, but its not important." I said, "You should be careful, there are people like me who are similar and don't ever want to catch any disease ever."
Dawn said, "It's no big deal, you shouldn't think like that." I said "I think you have it the other way around, I think you should keep this in mind because I think what you are doing is a crime. If someone's life is completely altered because you would not tell them what you knew; your medical records will be able to prove that one day. If those records come out, then you are going to be in trouble for not telling people if they could have taken preventative measures to not catch what you have." She said, "That's a funny joke, Susan." I said, "That type of change in life is big, and there are medications needing to be taken at random times. If the medication costs money, that is a situation which alters people's lives and pocketbooks. Technically, I guesstimate that could be a true thing to occur. No one I would think, would want to deal with that if they did not have to."
Shortly as the discussion came to a close, we arrived at Graham Central Station. The little bit of dancing that happened inside of the club was fun and towards the end of the night, Ayaz asked me on a date. I told him I was not looking for anything serious at the time, but we could try a few dates to see if things worked out. After several weeks of dating, he saw my van and asked me what was inside. I let him sit in the passenger seat and he was amazed by the various points of the van as well as the multiple air vents, throughout the back. He walked through to see the back and the adjustments which could be made to the different air flow, and asked me several questions. When done I chuckled asking him "Are there vans, in England? I thought they had many types of vehicles there, too."
He said, "I didn't get to drive, when over there."
At some point he told me he was going to visit his mom in India, and see some of his extended family. Ayaz Sheik said he was not allowed to go to Bahrain but did not tell me why he was not allowed in the country, but he wanted me to go with him to India. I told him "No, I have two children I need to take care of. I cannot go, and I will not leave this area." Ayaz asked, "Why, not?" I said, "I cannot leave the state of Texas for a long time, and I cannot go outside of The United States of America." He asked me, "Why?" I said, "I don't think it is a good idea, for me personally." Ayaz asked me, "What is the worst thing, you think could happen?"
I said, "If people on the plane see me and they hear me speak on the way to that region of the world, I would be lucky if they didn't stone me to death before the plane landed. If the plane landed and there was a holdover area, I would be lucky if I was not stoned or burned at the stake if there for longer than five minutes." Ayaz asked me, "Why?"
I said, "I guesstimate in the area if they found out about my Psalm Sunday 2000 head injury and where I was raised, the fact I am medically retired from the Army for The United States of America because of that injury, and from New Jersey; they would either lead me to slaughter or torture me until my death and I don't want that."
He said as he put his hand on my shoulder, "You can believe, that is not how everyone is there."
I said, "Oh, I know that is a fact. Not all Muslims are like that, however there are some which are very much so. I cannot put everyone in the Armed Forces at risk, in The United States of America. Obviously my children I always think about their safety, but the military does not need that and nor do the allies of our country. I cannot allow that to happen, and I will not go with you to India." He asked, "What if it was another country?" I said, "If it is not the United States of America, the answer is no." He said, "You sure are a proud one, of the country." I said, "I am extremely proud of my country, and I will not put my country at risk for anyone. I will do whatever I need to for my country and I will not put anyone at risk if I can avoid it." He said, "You cannot prevent everything, from happening."
I said, "You're right, people have their own free will. I am merely just me, and because I am just me; I know I can only control myself as me. I know on the other hand my choices affect others and as I can only do the best I can to be me, I can only do so much to keep what I hold near and dear safe. I know if I go overseas right now, there are too many people who would be put into harms way and I will not risk that for anyone."
For the next couple of weeks he wanted me to go with him and tried to convince me, but I refused each time. When the day came before his flight he asked me for a picture of myself and the only picture I had of myself without my children, had been from high school in my senior year. He said, "You look exactly the same in this picture as you do right now. Your hair is a little bit longer, but nothing else has changed." I said, "Okay, I will take your word on that. I hope your mom and dad, are not offended by me." He said, "I think my mom and dad, are going to want to speak with you in many ways." I shrugged my shoulders, as he went to get himself read and I left his apartment near the Medical Center in San Antonio. It was a loft style apartment with a kitchen, living room, dining room, and downstairs patio on the first floor with an open style bedroom on the top floor. I think it was either a one bedroom setup or a one bedroom with a spare area for where he did his daily prayers.
The arrangement was similar to a duplex or a quadplex or a townhouse as if I remember correctly, there was another row of similar apartments in the area of the same building behind where his apartment was located. To get to his apartment there was a parking lot and then I had to walk on a pathway past a few buildings before getting to the building he was in, and he was on the far end corner with no one to the left when facing the entrance door. After he left a few days later he called me with his mom on the phone and the three of us spoke, as she asked me about myself. I asked her respectfully what she wanted to know about me and she had told me "Ayaz did not tell me much about you, and I want to know."
I told her about myself and she listened before asking me "Do you know what tea leaf readings, are?"
I said, "Yes, Ma'am. I know exactly what they are, and how they work if you do it properly. I know there are some similar to me who can drink a cup of tea with loose leaves while thinking of a question and when the tea is finished there are two ways to finish the reading, but it depends."
She asked, "Did you know you can use a tea bag, as well?"
I said, "Yes Ma'am, but the type with the metal strainer happens to be the better way because of the paper being a bit of a damper whereas the metal enhances a bit, to assist with the reading."
For a little bit she was quiet before asking me, "What do you do, when you have done a tea leaf reading?"
I said, "I drink the tea while thinking of the questions and then I read either the leaves which fell into the cup from the strainer and/or I pour the leaves out onto a plate, to read the information from there."
Afterwards from that point of the conversation she asked me a few other questions before we got off of the phone and Ayaz and I spoke, for a little bit more. Later during his time in the area he told me of his mom wanting him to marry his second or third cousin instead of dating me, and we talked randomly until he returned to The United States of America from his trip. When we got together he told me about his dad's safe in the area he visited him and showed Ayaz several watches and gemstone, which Ayaz was surprised I was not as impressed as he was when he was explaining what he saw.
Ayaz continued telling me of the precious gemstones and the bars of gold throughout the safe but then became upset when I told him, "Those are your dad's, you know that."
He said, "No, they are mine when he dies."
I said, "Ayaz, but your dad is alive. Until that day comes and if he leaves that to you, that in his safe are his. That's not yours, and you are not entitled to that just because he is your dad."
Ayaz said, "You don't know what you're talking about, Susan."
I said, "I guesstimate if your dad is upset with you, he will let you know that in that safe does not mean it is yours because he earned that stuff and you had not. If he chooses not to give you that stuff, you can't be mad at him. That was his stuff you saw, and not yours. If you didn't earn it, its not yours."
Ayaz asked, "Do you know what would happen, if you said that to me outside of this area?"
I said, "It does not matter, because we are not there and I am not going there. I told you, this is the way it is. Also, it does not change what is not yours, is not yours."
Shortly afterwards he and I broke up after his dad had put a freeze on Ayaz' checking account, and Ayaz was infuriated. During the time of Ayaz' trip had been the pokey game I had written about in my book which I was invited to go to and won the poker game, albeit being upset by the way I was supposed to try to not show I had a winning hand. I still am going to say/write despite having a Royal Flush I still had the two pair thing for the Texas Hold Them Poker with a Queen of Hearts and an Ace of Spades in my hands, and a Queen of Spades and an Ace of Diamonds on the table; I won with technically both two pair and a Royal Flush, but the paper I was given to read did not say anything about a Royal Flush.
Though I admit I still get pout thinking about what Tony told me to think about instead of the hand I had but I do not think he realized at the time when he told me to "think about dead baby seals"; I was saddened thinking about the SEALS and how I did not want them to get hurt, which I guesstimate in certain ways goes back to my choice to join the Armed Forces of The United States of America for the purposes I had as well as the Navy Cross recipient, among a few other reasons. If anyone had read my first two books with a military background but in specific to either the Coast Guard and/or the Marine Corps and/or the Navy; I guesstimate maybe one or a few of them were able to put that together while not discrediting someone from the Army or the Air Force of the United States of America could have pieced that together.
In reference to that in combination with the issues I have had since waking up from the coma from the head injury on Psalm Sunday in 2000 but more along the lines of technology and the reality of #BestBuy's #GeekSquad especially knowing to the level of which my problems with technology usage are after one male from Pheasant Creek subdivision who would know and be the first with the most extensive knowledge of how bad the issues were/are for me as I had explained to him what I had done, when the fire in the laptop had broken out and what happened to be the cause afterwards; which was before when I volunteered at #NineLivesBooks in San Antonio and that whole #ER situation which few at the time believed me was important to pay attention to.
I did not think it took a head injury to realize most people in the government for The United States of America are able to call a direct phone line to a government installation and are able to point to the person who drove the son to the ER with his girlfriend and have the nurse tell the son "Your dad is on the phone" before she looked at me and said "His dad said thank you, you can leave now." I have said it before and I will say it again, I don't think it takes a head injury to figure out the level of government clearance that guy has; not forgetting the phone call as soon as I returned to the sore and only after closing the door in the back for the phone to somehow ring just at that precise moment. So for those of you who do not believe in the capabilities of people who have access to that sort of technology, good morning. They have been working with that stuff for a few days most likely, before you were born.
That being stated (again), after the situation at #CowboysDanceHall and after getting to #Vancouver #Washington of which I wrote about in my first two books at #BestBuy on #Clackamas when I had brought that laptop into Best Buy for Geek Squad to look at that one to see it could not be repaired like all of the prior laptops I had ever bought into the company using the Accidental Warranty plan; I wrote of a situation which I will elaborate of here. If there is a connection to the above written aspects, then I apologize for not seeing such before. After the amount of zapping when going through the state of #California before and after the silver #Lexus SUV had cut my silver #Honda #Civic off on the highway and caused me to drive into the ditch because of the male driver not paying attention or caring and the female passenger video taping with her cellphone to then go to the #StatePatrol officer on the frontage road area to complain of me blowing a kiss instead of what they thought of me flipping them off after their fault for being incompetently careless when driving.
When the Geek Squad male told my now ex-boyfriend Jesse Leroy Hoover Jr and I that Best Buy said I "can purchase items from Best Buy but cannot purchase the accidental warranty" after I had explained to him about the problems I have had with technology since my Psalm Sunday 2000 head injury, that male told me he "had moved from India to the US to be a part of a college research study for [his] PhD in seeing how energy works with computer technology and [he] needed someone to study for [his] research project for the school" which without hesitation I said "I am not willing to be a guinea pig for anyone, I already did my time in the medical arena for my Psalm Sunday 2000 head injury for The United States of America and I am not willing to be a guinea pig for anyone else for any reason ever." At that point he said "But we can offer you a few thousand dollars, for the study" and I said, "What part of no, don't you understand? I am not willing to be a part of that, at all, whatsoever. No, means no."
Then my now ex-boyfriend Jesse Leroy Hoover Jr told me to go outside with my son James as the technology alarms in the Best Buy started beeping and going off sporadically, making my headaches worse; and James had to help me walk outside because of the high pitch noises causing my headaches more pain. When doing what I could to force myself not to pass out because of the additional pain levels, he and I got to the car and waited for Jesse to return outside. Due to the pain levels heightening already before going to Best Buy but after all of the additional technology stuff in the location of the Best Buy and then adding the sounds making my pain worse, I did what I could to ensure I could function as best as I could. Shortly after getting back to the apartment at #CrystalCreek on #Minnehaha I was told to look at getting the MMJ license in order, as Jesse reminded me of the benefits he saw when I had vaped through using (what I realized later) the Volcano only was assistive as the e-cigarette pens did not assist in the way the non-electrically connected MMJ had assisted. The closest later I found which could help were the medibles; though the Volcano had been what assisted me far more than the medibles ever could, as I found for myself.
When the situation at Crystal Creek hit the peak of the problems and I had to get my son and I out of there because of what was occurring because of the apartment beneath the location of ours in #42D and that would be when Jesse said "we need to move closer to Seattle because that is the location for ITT Tech that I can go to school"; which is how that ended up happening. Due to the loudness of where I am this will be the end point of the blog journal post as any other questions, law enforcement knows where to find me to ask me if there is anything further. I forced myself to get here to finish this writing and the pain levels from last night have not subsided and the loudness is not assisting such thus, if there are any questions I do not cammo anywhere but especially in the state of Texas; so I will just stop here.
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