In reference of combining all of my journals I wrote through my original #fetlife account which I will post the link at the bottom for the clarifications thereof, I am going to have the transparency brought forward as to what can be seen from the original posting dates as to the current timeframe of this day 28 November 2021 for those to see as to my original #Facebook accounts of Susan MeeLing as well as Lady Dori Belle for the additional ability to see the connection links as to what I had discussed for many years and decades in person as well as online as to such factors as best as I could as to the circumstances. Possibly such details will assist to make sense, in the comparisons thereof as to the amounts of details though in addition I do not pretend or hide myself from my truth which others should realize it is important to be honest and truthful in many more ways than just in one or two moments as it is imperative to be more capable to recognize the truth in such aspects of life for far more than some might have realized despite all of my warnings as to what I knew to bring forward to assist as best as possible.
I will begin with posting my newer updated journals from my original account and work backwards as to the irony I noticed. There will be plenty to read in the ways of, whether or not you choose to venture into the areas of the website fetlife.
Posted on 25 January 2011
Why? And so young? I have been interested in Leather since I was first introduced into the scene at 22, but I was intimidated from it from the start, though I knew it was what I wanted from the get go. Ahh, the good old days, when I was innocent and sweet, before the red hair and tattoos, before the long nights of thought provoking dreams and intense fantasies becoming reality. However, the days now, I would not change for the world, for now I am me, I am happy, I am stronger, and I can stand on my own two feet instead of leaning against someone else for support. I still need support, do not get me wrong, but I am not an invalid anymore like I used to be. No longer am I co-dependant to the point I was. So what am I?
I am protocol driven, though it may drive quite a few people mad, it is my choice; it is my life. I am not saying that Leather is for everyone, but it is for me. As I respect your choices for protocol, please respect my choices for my protocol.
I am what I am today because of my experiences, my thoughts, my actions, my past, my parents, my social situations, my ego, my friends, and situations that surround me. Partially, yes my fault, but partially to what has engulfed my life. In the end it is my choice, however for it is my life.
I am drawn to ritual, I am drawn to the meaning behind things, and I am drawn to the who/the what/the when/the where/ESPECIALLY the why/the how. For me, it gives me meaning, it pleasures my senses more. It adds more to life, to what I am doing, to what I am feeling, to what I am experiencing. It is not just a flogging that I am doing, it is spiritual as well as sexual as well as emotional as well as physical as well as mental as well as emotional, fulfilling all for myself and my partner. Same thing for fire play, wax play, caning, paddling, etc. It is not that I am just hitting someone with {enter weapon here}, I am connecting with them as well and we are releasing and building a better self for who we are as we go through each stroke, each transofrmation. For it is all a science, it is all a bit of magick.
Leather to me is more than just a practice, it is a combination of a spiritual path embracing life to help us on our journey, to aid us in correcting our ways, to make us into the people that we wish to become in every way possible as we are training ourselves mentally, emotionally, physically, and spiritually to let go of demons, accept ourself, work through problems, so on and so forth. I believe Leather is teaching us to accept one another for who we are, no matter what our kink is, to look past it and see who the person is for what is inside.
Personally, I am a Buddhist who believes in Faeries and Dragons and follows the Fey and Dragon way. The Faery and Dragon life are my primary way of living and then I add Buddhist principles to my morals, ethics, and common day values, actions, thoughts, and deeds; though as I said, primarily, the Fey are the top on the list, not that anyone is better than the other. Why the Faery? because they are mischevious, romantic, play on words, sweet, funny, jokesters, innocent, many other descriptions, and wise. Because they get excited over shiny objects (and ayone who knows me...) They live life to the fullest, as if every day is it's last...and with some of the things that I have been through and that I have seen; I refuse to take life for granted. It is time to start living in the now.
Leather is a part of my daily life and I love it. Whether I am reading about it, studying it in a class or demo, talking with a friend about it, or actually being able to practice it; I appreciate it for its worth. I feel it makes me strive to be a better person in a lot of ways as one has to be one hundred percent honest with oneself and anyone else in order to be involved with it. Honor, interigty, loyalty; those are just some of the beginning traits that are needed to work up to, to strive for, to have within oneself. I strive to achieve that goal.
I am going to try to make SPLF, but with a family, this make it difficult. I will see what I can work out, but I am going to work diligently to get there. If I can go, I will be thrilled to go to my first Leather event, but if not, it just was not meant to be my time. I will be disappointed and upset, but I am sure that there is another event that is meant for me to go to. I am waiting patiently, as patiently as I can...bouncing...I know when the time is right, it will be, but I hope it is soon.
My biggest fear is that I will offend someone and do the wrong protocol...that is my biggest worry...I hate messing up...I truly do as I am a perfectionist...I am a Virgo afterall...
Leather - LadyDoriBelle | FetLife
www. fetlife .com/users/484330/posts/526611
SIDE NOTATION 30 November 2021: Officially I only became involved with the BDSM and Leather and Swinger lifestyle scenes in the year of 2004, however as to having been born and raised in New Jersey and having been to multiple areas within New York City as well as New York State in conjunction to Pittsburg and Philadelphia Pennsylvania there are some factors of which in the later 1980s and into the 1990s of which such factors did not seem to be worth my time to have gone into the details of with various individuals during the timeframes of being in person at events within the areas during the years of 2004 through 2005 and from 2008 through 2012 as it was not enough as to the other details which such individuals were choosing as to what they paid attention to in the comparisons to the fuller aspects. However those who know of the areas as to those particular decades as to such times, then they know of such details as to the factors of such truths in such references thereof.