In reference of combining all of my journals I wrote through my original #fetlife account which I will post the link at the bottom for the clarifications thereof, I am going to have the transparency brought forward as to what can be seen from the original posting dates as to the current timeframe of this day 28 November 2021 for those to see as to my original #Facebook accounts of Susan MeeLing as well as Lady Dori Belle for the additional ability to see the connection links as to what I had discussed for many years and decades in person as well as online as to such factors as best as I could as to the circumstances. Possibly such details will assist to make sense, in the comparisons thereof as to the amounts of details though in addition I do not pretend or hide myself from my truth which others should realize it is important to be honest and truthful in many more ways than just in one or two moments as it is imperative to be more capable to recognize the truth in such aspects of life for far more than some might have realized despite all of my warnings as to what I knew to bring forward to assist as best as possible.
I will begin with posting my newer updated journals from my original account and work backwards as to the irony I noticed. There will be plenty to read in the ways of, whether or not you choose to venture into the areas of the website fetlife.
Posted on 22 April 2013
I am breaking the silence...
Most think that I am a 'big mouth' and a 'shit stirrer' and etc., of the like.
I could be...I may be at times...however...NOT without just cause...
...
This writing...I am breaking the silence...
Yes, this is in reference to the Colorado Mentor thread ...but this is also MY personal experience...
Yes, I am a graduate of the Dallas Mentors Program for 2011-2012.
I enjoyed all of my time, all of the Mentors who were able to spend time with me and educate me in a variety of forms of play/BDSM/Lifestyle/etc.
I was enthralled with the classes and boot camps.
I was ecstatic about all that I was a part of and all that I was learning.
I started in the A.M.P. (Austin Mentor Program) back in 2011; however, due to family issues, I needed to move back to the Dallas area.
As I was lucky enough to be able to achieve most classes/Mentors that I was interested in within the A.M.P.; I put myself into a corner when I was asked if I "was sure that your [my] list is what you [I] want to submit for review?"
Me ~ "Yeppers!"
End Result ~ between 2-4 Mentors per month...4-8 hour meetings per Mentor...PLUS homework from most Mentors...to say it made for a busy time...interesting...to say the least...however...A WHOLE BUNCH of FUN and A LOT of LEARNING for me and MANY EXPERIENCES that I never expected!!!
The A.M.P. and those involved, were all AMAZING as I went through the Program.
Now...I was able to finish up to August 2011, with all of my Mentors, and all meetings/homework; before my move to DFW. Once I was in DFW; I had a whole new system to learn and be a part of.
Instead of multiple Mentors each month, I was given the standard of 1 Mentor a month; which was perfectly fine with me, at the time. I was going back and forth between Arkansas and DFW; so the less amount of time for homework/projects/etc. made it much easier on me.
Once I was in the D.M.P.; a lot changed, beyond the amount of time with any Mentors.
Obviously, those people were different than those whom I had grown with, for the entire year...
I missed my classmates...still do...but other point altogether...
The majority of my "new classmates" had issues with my transfer, and MANY voiced their opinions of how I "should start over next year"; due to me coming from a different Mentor Program. However, I was still allowed entry and the ability to pass in order to graduate.
When I was awarded my patch...I was shaking from disbelief from actually finishing the program to enhance myself, for the better. I finally felt as if I had "earned" my Leather Boots.
To don those beauties for the first time, after looking at them in my closet for over a year...sigh...I have been in heaven every single time I put those on...
...
I receive a phone call from a fellow graduate of mine, after being fetmailed, asking if this individual could speak with me on a different level than most Lifestyle topics. After agreeing and sending my phone number; within just a few minutes, my phone rang.
I spoke with the said individual about how he had a moral dilemma; though never stating what it actually was; and he wanted to know the moral and ethical reaction for reducing karma.
I explained that owning up to what was done to wrong another is always the first step.
After a little bit more discussion; the call was over.
As I had already have started to become accustomed to the new apartment that I found for my family and I; I randomly received a phone call from an old friend; one I knew when I originally entered the BDSM Lifestyle scene, in San Antonio; around 2004 time frame.
I was informed that there was a male who would date/play female submissives/slaves; NOT inform the females of the STD carried; wait until a certain point (usually sub-space) to re-negotiate so there could be bare-back involved...thus spreading said disease...
A friend of mine was one of the victims...like hell I was going to sit idly by and 'hope' for retribution...several OTHER females came forward, as well.
Just the exact same thing as what is happening in the C.M.P. ~ only diseases that are transmutable are involved in this scenario, with Dallas.
Once I was informed that it was a graduate of the Mentor Program; I asked who.
As I was informed of who it was; and it being the same person who contacted me months prior about karma, from my graduating class from the D.M.P.; I ended the call with the female, in order to contact Master Walker.
Master David Walker; though EXTREMELY personable and nice; did not do as I thought or even had an idea of.
MDW had rearranged his schedule to be my Mentor for the 2nd month that I was in the D.M.P. He put his phone number into my speed dial, because of my lack of understanding of my phone.
Side Note: (it is sad when my son knows more about my phone than I do ~ just sayin'...)
Master David Walker told me to call him whenever I wanted and/or needed, for whatever was happening; and prior to this event, he and I had been in contact at random times.
So, I THOUGHT that going to him for assistance would be ideal.
WRONG
When I spoke with MDW on the phone and I explained the situation from the point of original contact by said graduate and then the information from said female and males involved; after a brief explanation, I was told;
"Do not worry Lady Dori Belle."
(he usually called me by my first name ~ so obviously a bit of a shock)
"...I will and have started to take care of this situation...you need not worry..." as he finished before MDW ended the phone call with me.
Hmmm...
...interestingly weird...and DEFINITELY not the response that I had expected from this "Leather-Man"...
The female has been randomly banned from a variety of groups and the dungeon, on and off...
...the male continues to be fully involved with his community...
...actually...said male now holds his own parties...and still holds his graduate title...
MDW and the male, are now friends and "associates"...
I made several posts on this thread and I have had MANY fetmails and SEVERAL phone calls, about my written words.
1.) One of the calls (and voicemail) that I received in response WAS from MDW, who asked to speak with me...I did NOT return the call...especially after my prior experience...
2.) Sexual assault and on-consensual ANYTHING should not be tolerated under ANY circumstances...PERIOD!!!
Yes, I have been sexually abused/assaulted...starting in my childhood...the final assaulter being my ex-husband...which did include rape.
So...my tolerance for allowing predators in...is MUCH lower than most...
I do not care about my lack of tolerance for assaulters...in my opinion; ALL SEXUAL ASSAILANTS SHOULD BE CASTRATED AFTER CONVICTION...
MY opinion...they cannot be "reformed"...so...why waste any of the budget to "try to rebilatate" them?
Whole other ball of wax on that point...
3.) The allowance of these type of 'people' should NOT be allowed to teach/Mentor/have anything to do with [enter community here], unless proven reform has been shown...and even THEN...I would be iffy on that...
4.) Final fetmails that I received...sigh...San Antonio...sigh...really...?...sigh...
The pathetic excuse for a "Leadership Counsel" is laughable...at best...
To appoint people to "be in charge" only because that person runs whatever group...funny...!...sad...!...ridiculous...!...
As messed up as San Antonio is and has turned into the mess that is the bed laid in...
Take a hint from larger communities...learn from them...try not to make the same mistakes...though you already have LONG ago with SEVERAL individuals...it is what it is...
...look at fixing the problems and issues INSTEAD of writing about things...AND ACTUALLY GO OUT AND DO WHAT
YOU SAY...versus bitching...
(1) Breaking the Silence of the A.C.&D. -M.P.s - LadyDoriBelle | FetLife
www. fetlife .com/users/484330/posts/1521365
While I have not ever sexually assaulted and I have no intentions to ever to anyone yet have dealt with such factors as to the multitudes thereof as to how many times I have had to defend myself as to the levels thereof, what situations of which were falsely accused of me as o the situations which I did not ever have the chance to defend myself ironically as to such false accusations if such of any in existence as to how adamant have I always been as to etiquette as realistically what I have done to keep myself above water as to such situations has been a ridiculous amount as to such factors. Especially when taking "Finding A Silver Lining (Written) By: (Reverend) Susan MeeLing" and "The Modern Day Book (Written) By: Reverend Susan MeeLing" plus the factors of my journal blog #TheOrneryPSA The Ornery PSA, as to such clarifications of what I have personally dealt with as to such factors for the example as to how I was pregnant and legally through the #JusticeofthePeace Justice of the Peace legally only as to why I am a legal widow though only 1.5 years out of my coma with the subarachnoid hemorrhage in the frontal lobe of my brain still there when I carried and delivered my son #Letters4James as well as 2.5 years when in reference to being pregnant with and carrying to deliver my daughter #Letters4Lidia as to the knowledge of everyone in such a point in time.
Literally myself being considered a spiritual virgin, born in the sign of Virgo as well, among the additional facts brought forward as have I ever truthfully gone awry in such comparisons especially as to the proverbial age aspects?